What are your favorite funny sayings/comebacks?

[Old Goat1]

When I am greeted by "How are you today?", I always reply "Like a old man".

[doeboy11]

Dumber than a box of hoe handles (hammer handles)

[bloodtrail18]

Like a sore peter, you can't beat it...

[kmack]

Stop confusing the issue with logic!

[91cavgt]

We are always here, but are never there.



My wife and daughter hate it when I say that in response to one of them asking if we are there yet.

[Southbound 85]

Yeah, well if my aunt had a di€k she’d be my uncle.

[AndyMane]

"Can't tie a knot, tie a lot."

"Hotter than a goat snatch in a pepper patch"

"It's better to thought dumb than to speak and remove all doubt"

[Hoggslayer]

I don't understand that level of stupidity, but I respect your commitment to it.

I don't think you have the testicular fortitude to pull that off.

Sent from my SM-A526U using Tapatalk

[sotx]

Go fu%$ yourself, is my go to come back most of the time.

[lck90]

I got a degree, not an education.

[Martin]

When I was a young heathen, my uncle, when he had all he could stand would point his pocket knife at me and say: boy....if you don't beat it...I'm gonna split your sack and run your leg through it!
We would usually leave.

[N.DaWoods]

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

[jake-1024]

You shut your mouth when you’re talking to me.

[cj7zrcool]

If you're gonna stand, don't stand in the way.

[Gumbo Man]

Don’t look at me in that tone of voice.