Old guy sayings

[Hydestik]

Boy you got a head on you like a hen dirt dauber

[jmac24]

If you are going to F*** Up, F*** up going full speed!!

[Chad74]

She's uglier than 5 miles of dirt road

[riverbowman]

Heard this from my grandad most times I was at his house. Usually when one of us touched the thermostat. Weeeeellll..., horse sh**!

[ThisLadyHunts]

In my clumsier moments, my dad would say, “Well, that was about as graceful as a monkey F***ing a football.”

[kmack]

"He's still one piece of cardboard shy of a full box of rocks!" (for those REALLY lacking in intelligence)

[hoghunter69]

do what needs to be done first, what you want to do second

[MagicBlade]

Keep it up and I'll knock you into next week!

Somethings in this world you just have to do whether you like it or not!

[bboswell]

Use your head for something besides a hat rack Boy! - Step Dad

[Matteo]

Play stupid games. Win stupid prizes.
Dumber than a box of rocks.
He isnt scared of work. He'll lay down right next to it.
Give him books and he'll chew the covers off.

[tpack]

Like a wild goose *****ting by the moonlight.

[boy wonder]

When something was hard to do or heavy, my old boss would say "that'll take 2 men and a boy". Another boss would tell me "When you're off, it's like having 2 good people at work".

[SN10]

You can get glad on the same pants you got mad in.

If you wanna hoot with the night owls, you gotta soar with the eagles.

Just a dollar waitin’ on a dime. (When you’ve been waiting on someone and they say “Are you ready to go?” Referring to your worth compared to the others. )

[J-5]

FIL:
- "Quit confusing the issue with logic!"

Step-Dad:
- "Just follow the fence line" (when someone wasn't smart enough to not get lost)
- "They're hell-bent for leather!" (when you're doing something that would get you a whooping later on)

Dad:
- "That's finer than a white-girls c u nt hair" (when something was really small or hard to see)
- "He's sweating like a whore in church!"

Dad's Dad:
- "Marry a girl with small hands."

That last one is some sound advice!

[Baygall]

My uncle always says “I quit school in the third grade on account of recess cause I don’t play!