I need some help in talking to a friend about something...

[TRexFace]

First off, I tend to ramble and if I am I'm sorry.

Ok so I was over at a female friend's apartment and I saw an empty magazine to a small handgun and inquired about said handgun. Note I said -inquired- I didn't give a d4mn to see it. Never owned a gun maybe I will maybe I won't but sitting and gee gawwing them is unnecessary. She pulls it out of her kitchen drawer and I see that the breech is open and her hands are actually cupping it, but when she hands it to me she is holding the barrel pointed directly at my sternum.
I don't blow up or swat the gun away because I don't want to startle someone so blase with a deadly weapon, but say something along the lines of "You need to seriously reconsider where that gun is pointed right now".
Here is where the problem is- after I grab the gun her response is "Well, there's no bullet and it's not even "racked" (whatever the 43ll that means). I told her that every gun is loaded, and when it's not pointed at a target it needs pointed down, cleared, and safed.
So here's what I need to know: I feel like I under-reacted. I let that barrel point right at me, and I didn't ditch her as a friend right then and there because she's an amazing person with a good reason to need to feel safe as her husband was machete'd 80 times by his mistress's ex husband. Traumatized. What is a good way to not only confront her about my hurt feelings from her blase attitude, but to convince an over confident bloviator that their @$$ needs checked and educated or they need to be completely disarmed? Also, assuming I'm staring directly at a barrel again how do I turn my calm switch off?

It was a crap gun btw. Some sheisty POS .380

[Gunnyart]

You could offer to get her in a self defence course. Lots of ranges do very low cost course for ladies.

[Todd-ty729]

This friend seems to have an easy time finding trouble.

Might put more space between yourself and her.

Machete and mistress in the same sentence is enough for me.

As far as how you handled the gun deal I wasn't there and am not real clear on the details. You said you ramble...yup!

[Smart]

I need some help in talking to a friend about something...

Most folks would just say, "easy with the muzzle" and take their hand slowly pushing it away. And then explain themselves. Nobody needs a macho slapping away of the barrel or blowing up. Just be calm, slow and quiet. It works better that way.

[BigRed323]

First off, I tend to ramble and if I am I'm sorry.

Ok so I was over at a female friend's apartment and I saw an empty magazine to a small handgun and inquired about said handgun. Note I said -inquired- I didn't give a d4mn to see it. Never owned a gun maybe I will maybe I won't but sitting and gee gawwing them is unnecessary. She pulls it out of her kitchen drawer and I see that the breech is open and her hands are actually cupping it, but when she hands it to me she is holding the barrel pointed directly at my sternum.
I don't blow up or swat the gun away because I don't want to startle someone so blase with a deadly weapon, but say something along the lines of "You need to seriously reconsider where that gun is pointed right now".
Here is where the problem is- after I grab the gun her response is "Well, there's no bullet and it's not even "racked" (whatever the 43ll that means). I told her that every gun is loaded, and when it's not pointed at a target it needs pointed down, cleared, and safed.
So here's what I need to know: I feel like I under-reacted. I let that barrel point right at me, and I didn't ditch her as a friend right then and there because she's an amazing person with a good reason to need to feel safe as her husband was machete'd 80 times by his mistress's ex husband. Traumatized. What is a good way to not only confront her about my hurt feelings from her blase attitude, but to convince an over confident bloviator that their @$$ needs checked and educated or they need to be completely disarmed? Also, assuming I'm staring directly at a barrel again how do I turn my calm switch off?

It was a crap gun btw. Some sheisty POS .380

It can still kill you the same as any other gun

[Hookem84]

Most folks would just say, "easy with the muzzle" and take their hand slowly pushing it away. And then explain themselves. Nobody needs a macho slapping away of the barrel or blowing up. Just be calm, slow and quiet. It works better that way.

This no reason to jump all over her just explain to her that you always treat the gun as if it's loaded. But if it was loaded and you did the whole slap it away from you and freak out there's more of a chance she accidently pulls the trigger than not.

[Corn Sack]

Are you drunk?

[atx_hunter]

This friend seems to have an easy time finding trouble.

Might put more space between yourself and her.

Machete and mistress in the same sentence is enough for me.

I agree... Sometimes you need to pull the lever

[d_e_smith]

[/B]

It can still kill you the same as any other gun

Especially with one racked in the chamber.

[TRexFace]

Most folks would just say, "easy with the muzzle" and take their hand slowly pushing it away. And then explain themselves. Nobody needs a macho slapping away of the barrel or blowing up. Just be calm, slow and quiet. It works better that way.

This no reason to jump all over her just explain to her that you always treat the gun as if it's loaded. But if it was loaded and you did the whole slap it away from you and freak out there's more of a chance she accidently pulls the trigger than not.

Well, that's why I said ""You need to seriously reconsider where that gun is pointed right now". I was hoping to get her to stop, shut up, and look at what she was doing. Didn't work out.

It can still kill you the same as any other gun

Everyone's always curious

Are you drunk?

No sir. Teetotaler. Almost.

[Davoh]

First off, I tend to ramble and if I am I'm sorry.

Ok so I was over at a female friend's apartment and I saw an empty magazine to a small handgun and inquired about said handgun. Note I said -inquired- I didn't give a d4mn to see it. Never owned a gun maybe I will maybe I won't but sitting and gee gawwing them is unnecessary. She pulls it out of her kitchen drawer and I see that the breech is open and her hands are actually cupping it, but when she hands it to me she is holding the barrel pointed directly at my sternum.
I don't blow up or swat the gun away because I don't want to startle someone so blase with a deadly weapon, but say something along the lines of "You need to seriously reconsider where that gun is pointed right now".
Here is where the problem is- after I grab the gun her response is "Well, there's no bullet and it's not even "racked" (whatever the 43ll that means). I told her that every gun is loaded, and when it's not pointed at a target it needs pointed down, cleared, and safed.
So here's what I need to know: I feel like I under-reacted. I let that barrel point right at me, and I didn't ditch her as a friend right then and there because she's an amazing person with a good reason to need to feel safe as her husband was machete'd 80 times by his mistress's ex husband. Traumatized. What is a good way to not only confront her about my hurt feelings from her blase attitude, but to convince an over confident bloviator that their @$$ needs checked and educated or they need to be completely disarmed? Also, assuming I'm staring directly at a barrel again how do I turn my calm switch off?

It was a crap gun btw. Some sheisty POS .380

IMHO, you were right to be nervous, but "angry"?? I dunno bout that.

I've been in a very similar situation before(almost identical, actually). I very gently brushed the gun to the side with the back of my off-hand to get out of the muzzle line, then took it from them to verify safe/clear. Then I calmly entered a two-way conversation of firearm safety with them.

"What do you know of fire-arm safety?"

First rule: Every gun is always loaded. Many people have killed themselves with a weapon that was presumed to be empty or safe. Never point a weapon at anything you do not intended to destroy.

Etc etc.

At the end of the day, your feelings on the matter, don't matter at all. If you blow up at her, it just causes more hurt feelings and their instinct for defensiveness negates any attempts to educate. Once she understands the gravity of the situation, then discuss your feelings, and let her know how nervous and instantly unwelcome in her home that made you.

[skeeter]

Offer to take a fire arm safety course with her.

[Tx625]

Offer to take a fire arm safety course with her.

This, my friend got shot last year because of someone like her. I understand people showing off there guns and what not but she needs someone to help her understand that that gun she has, can KILL you. And she needs someone to help her realize what that gun is capable of. I agree with Smart on the staying calm part. If it where me, I would have a calm conversation with her, and offer to take her to some sort of firearm training. She needs it, and you could be saving a life by doing it. And if that doesn't work, you are more than welcome to bring her to meet my friend. He somehow survived, after spending 9 months in the hospital, yes 9, he has now been home stuck on his couch for 6 months, with tubes every where. Good luck.

[Backwoods101]

I need to know more about this machete'n

[flywise]

I never have seen the big deal with a gun that you knew was empty pointed at you was.
I have had friends freak out when i handed them my rifle with the bolt removed. Sure, its always better not to point a gun at anyone and to try and keep it pointed in a safe direction but when it cant possibly fire it's not a big deal to me personally.