Lame jokes

[jdbfish]

Not sure if this qualifies but get a visual on this;

Mr. Potatoehead goes up to a urinal, pauses for a short time then hollers in disappointment "dang, I knew I forgot to put something on this morning!"

Now that's funny, don't care who u are!

[W-O]

Old man goes to the doctor with a personal problem. The doctor gives him a bottle of pills and tells him to come back in a week.

A week goes by and the old man returns.

Doctor: Well, how are you doing, did it work?

Old Man: No Doc, no change. I tried with my right hand, then I tried with my left hand. My wife tried with her right hand, then with her left hand and then with both hands. She tried with teeth in and with teeth out. Frustrated she went next door and got the neighbor lady. The neighbor lady tried with her right hand, then with her left hand and then with both hands. The neighbor lady tried with teeth in and with teeth out.

The Doctor Interupted: Wait, wait, your wife got the neighbor lady involved.

Old Man: Yeah and we still can't get the lid off the bottle.

I'm ashamed of some of you, you have dirty minds.

[zr2chevy22]

Why is 8 scared of 7 cause 7 ate 9

My niece told me this one but it goes,

"Why is 6 afraid of 7. Cause 7 8 9."

[HoustonHunter]

A guy was going to his girlfriends house to eat dinner with her parents. When he arrived, he realized he had terrible gas. As they sat down to eat, he noticed a dog under the table. Spot was walking around looking for crumbs.

Thinking he better take advantage of the dog being close, the guy lets out some gas.

"Spot, get out from under there" hollers the dad.

A sigh of relief--the dad thinks it's the dog so he decides to let out another one.

"Spot, get out I said!" This time, the father seems more upset at spot.

Seizing the opportunity, he lets out one last rip to ease his stomach.

"Spot! Get out from under there before he $h*ts on you!"

[aac_shooter]

Where do you get dragon milk?
-From a cow with short legs.

What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
-Rough

[El Forajido]

Have you ever smelled mothballs? .........How did you get his legs open?

[4wheels]

AHHHHH B 'MOVIE' THREAD.. Can't stop reading...

[Green]

A baby Seal walked into a club.....

[bartosh317]

Why did the skeleton not go to the dance?

cause he had no body to dance with

[arcfiddler]

Why do people not eat clowns? Because they taste funny....

[Sparkles]

Where do cousins come from?

Aunt holes

[Dirtymike]

What does Snoop Dog use to clean his clothes?

Bleeotch

Why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?

Fo drizzle

[super_dave]

What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground Beef

What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Lean beef

What do you call a dog with no legs?
Doesn't matter, he's not coming.

What do you call a dog with no back legs and steel balls?
Sparky

[Blood Trail]

A dyslexic man walks into a rab......

[Blood Trail]

Two hydrogen atoms sitting at a bar.
Atom #1: Say, bro, I think I lost an electron!

Atom #2: Are you sure?

Atom #3: Yep, I'm positive.



Yall good ol boys go on and let that marinade for a second.