My wife and I have managed to raise three pretty darn good kids, but one reason for that is they always knew which relationship was the most important one in the house - my wife and me. Period, end of story.
This accomplishes a lot of good things. First, it honors the commitment you made to your wife and God when you married her - to put her needs before your own and to honor the sacrament of Marriage.
Second, it keeps the kids from thinking they are more important than either of you, and that keeps them in line. If they know you will support your wife, and she will support you, there won't be any end-runs around either of you by the kids because they will know they will get in trouble for trying to undermine either of you
Third - by making your relationship with your wife the most important one in the house, you serve as a good and Godly example to your kids of how they should handle their marriage someday, and the importance of making it their priority when they become a husband or wife.
So yea, get right with your wife. Your kids will understand when they are older. There are a lot of things a kid can't understand when they are young, but will when they are older. That's just how it is.
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