Why do we lie to our kids?

[Crazy Horse]

This is the type of response I was originally expecting. Thank you for taking the time to respond in the way that you did.

I think that we can be truthful in all things while keeping a persons feeling in consideration. It might require some careful thought, but it can be accomplished.

Let's take the classic example. Honey, do these jeans make my butt look big?
You might actually think that her butt does look big. Instead of saying that, you tell her I don't know about that but those jeans make you beautiful.

You can turn the situation around and respond without lying, you just have to think it out. If you can't respond without lying then don't respond. It's almost as if we have to re-train our mind to not lie because it has become so normal to tell a lie.

Santa Claus was a real person, he was St. Nicolaus, a priest that loved kids and gave all his money to the poor. Explain to children that is where the story of Santa Claus comes from and that over time it evolved into what we now see as Santa. No lies needed and they can still enjoy Christmas and everything that comes with it.

Sir, that’s called “deception”.......the act of tricking someone by telling them something that is not true; especially schemes fabricated to mislead and/or delude someone into errantly believing a lie or inaccuracy.......and deceit sir IS lying....and as you’ve stated, all lying is a sin.

”You might actually think that her butt does look big. Instead of saying that, you tell her I don't know about that but...” ...and exactly HOW are your words are not deceitful?

Sugar coat it all you want, buuuuut.....

[doghouse]

I stole this from a friend on FB.

ATTENTION TO ALL PARENTS WHO NEED TO TELL THE TRUTH ABOUT SANTA 🎅
Son: "Dad, I think I'm old enough now. Is there a Santa Claus?."
Dad: "Ok, I agree that your old enough. But before I tell you, I have a question for you. You see, the “truth” is a dangerous gift. Once you know something, you can't unknow it. Once you know the truth about Santa Claus, you will never again understand and relate to him as you do now. So my question is: Are you sure you want to know?"
Brief pause...
Son: "Yes, I want to know"
Dad: "Ok, I'll tell you: Yes there is a Santa Claus"
Son: "Really?"
Dad: Yes, really, but he's not an old man with a beard in a red suit. That's just what we tell kids. You see, kids are too young to understand the true nature of Santa Claus, so we explain it to them in a way that they can understand. The truth about Santa Claus is that he's not a person at all; he's an idea. Think of all those presents Santa gave you over the years. I actually bought those myself. I watched you open them. And did it bother me that you didn't thank me? Of course not! In fact it gave me great pleasure. You see, Santa Claus is THE IDEA OF GIVING FOR THE SAKE OF GIVING, without thought of thanks or acknowledgement.
When I saw that woman collapse on the subway last week and called for help, I knew that she'd never know that it was me that summoned the ambulance. I was being Santa Claus when I did that."
Son: "Oh."
Dad: "So now that you know, you're part of it. You have to be Santa Claus too now. That means you can never tell a young kid the secret, and you have to help us select Santa presents for them, and most important, you have to look for opportunities to help people. Got it?"
Help each other this Christmas🎄🎅 and...be kind ❤💕

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[lovemylegacy]

When we let them believe or even propagate the belief in Santa Claus at Christmas time. I'm guilty of it, but it feels weird to teach my kids the importance telling the truth and honesty and then lie to them about Santa Claus.

We dont lie. We told our kids what santa claus is. Same with the tooth fairy, peter cottontail, so on so forth

[tvc184]

Of all the other sh*t we should be worried about with our kids today and this is what is being debated….

This isn’t a debate. It is a discussion forum to kill time.

[rladner]

I see the OP’s point especially from the perspective of poverty stricken kids or because of bad parents.

Some little whipper snappers put a lot of faith in Santa for extreme disappointment.

Because of this I’d like to urge you folk to give to programs like “Toys for Tots”.

Merry Christmas

Or

https://discussions.texasbowhunter.com/forums/showthread.php?t=857332

[Johnny44]

I see the OP’s point especially from the perspective of poverty stricken kids or because of bad parents.

Some little whipper snappers put a lot of faith in Santa for extreme disappointment.

Because of this I’d like to urge you folk to give to programs like “Toys for Tots”.

Merry Christmas

[Graysonhogs]

The above argument holds no water because who doesn’t love phat asses? Seriously whats wrong with yall. I remind my wife all the time she has a big ***. Part of the reason I married her.

You married a unicorn


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[Ætheling]

The above argument holds no water because who doesn’t love phat asses? Seriously whats wrong with yall. I remind my wife all the time she has a big ***. Part of the reason I married her.

[Graysonhogs]

This is the type of response I was originally expecting. Thank you for taking the time to respond in the way that you did.

I think that we can be truthful in all things while keeping a persons feeling in consideration. It might require some careful thought, but it can be accomplished.

Let's take the classic example. Honey, do these jeans make my butt look big?
You might actually think that her butt does look big. Instead of saying that, you tell her I don't know about that but those jeans make you beautiful.

You can turn the situation around and respond without lying, you just have to think it out. If you can't respond without lying then don't respond. It's almost as if we have to re-train our mind to not lie because it has become so normal to tell a lie.

Santa Claus was a real person, he was St. Nicolaus, a priest that loved kids and gave all his money to the poor. Explain to children that is where the story of Santa Claus comes from and that over time it evolved into what we now see as Santa. No lies needed and they can still enjoy Christmas and everything that comes with it.

"Oh I'm not beautiful without these jeans? Your non answer tells me all I need to know. I guess I'm an ugly fat azz without these magic jeans". I can hear it now. I do think you've overthunk it to the point of absurdity. That's only my opinion but I could be wrong. We all have our own and do what works for us. One question: what do you do if they press you for an answer on the big butt question? Because more than a .5 second pause will be taken as a "yes". Guess you could plead the Fifth

[rowdybass]

My kids know that Christmas is about the birth of Jesus Christ and also believe or have believed in Santa.

You can have it both ways.


My daughter soon to be 13 knows Santa isn’t real but plays along because she doesn’t want to spoil the fun for her brother who is soon to be 10.

Not everything is black and white.


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This right here ^^^^

[C.Read]

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[ThisLadyHunts]

You can call it lying, you can call it pretending, but I believe intent has a lot to do with the true definition of a lie. For example, if you believe something and it is wrong, but you believe it to be correct, are you lying? No, you are just wrong. You have no intent to deceive. You can argue that the Santa Clause thing is all about deceit ,but I would argue it is more about pretend will no ill intent. I mean, heck, we all watch TV and Movies. What are TV and Movies? They are people pretending to be someone/something else. Is it lying? Are they sinning by pretending to be someone they are not? No, why? Cause there is no ill intent. It is for entertainment. Santa Clause is for pretend and there is no ill intent. Just like when you tell your wife the jeans don't make her butt look big. You are not lying (as I believe it is defined) cause you are not perpetrating ill intent.

You can take the "shall not bear false witness" very very literally or you can try to understand what the intent of that was. To me, it was to prevent harm and ill intents.

But, to each their own.

Well said.


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[Smart]

You can call it lying, you can call it pretending, but I believe intent has a lot to do with the true definition of a lie. For example, if you believe something and it is wrong, but you believe it to be correct, are you lying? No, you are just wrong. You have no intent to deceive. You can argue that the Santa Clause thing is all about deceit ,but I would argue it is more about pretend will no ill intent. I mean, heck, we all watch TV and Movies. What are TV and Movies? They are people pretending to be someone/something else. Is it lying? Are they sinning by pretending to be someone they are not? No, why? Cause there is no ill intent. It is for entertainment. Santa Clause is for pretend and there is no ill intent. Just like when you tell your wife the jeans don't make her butt look big. You are not lying (as I believe it is defined) cause you are not perpetrating ill intent.

You can take the "shall not bear false witness" very very literally or you can try to understand what the intent of that was. To me, it was to prevent harm and ill intents.

But, to each their own.

Well said......well said..

[AntlerCollector]

Why just pick on ole St. Nick?

What about the Easter bunny, Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Ironman, etc. etc. are they all “lies” to your children? Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck never really fought over whether or not is was rabbit or duck season because THEY AINT REAL! Scooby Doo could never solved a mystery no matter how many Scooby snacks you gave him. The real Elmer Fudd was a vegetarian and would never shoot a rabbit. A coyote can literally outrun a roadrunner.

All our childhoods have been a “lie.”


Leave Santa alone!