Why do we lie to our kids?

[doright]

I stated earlier ,and I still stand by it, that I have no issue with what you tell your kids about santa. The problem is with the lying aspect of it. They need to know that people lie. They are lied to when they turn on the tv. They are lied to when they go to school. I just wonder since you hate lying so much how you answer when your wife ask if she is prettier than her. Did the food taste good or a million other questions that the truth would not be in any ones best interest. If you ask me a serious question I will answer with the truth but not at the expense of devastating my loved ones feelings. (or going to jail )

[TxDispatcher]

The sheer insanity of some of the crap people worry about is beyond my comprehension. Do you, raise your kids how you see fit, make a statement about how you raise your kids...and heck, even proclaim that your way is better than anyone else's, I don't care. But to make the claims that other parents choosing to encourage imagination, and that the innocence of believing in Santa Claus is "lying to your kids and teaching them to lie" is a wee bit of a stretch, to put it kindly...I'd rather be blunt about it, but I respect Michael, Mary, and the mods and don't care to cause unneeded issues on this thread

[TexasCanesFan]

Exactly!!!

We have officially reset the bar for dumbest thread on TBH ever!!! Beyond belief.

[ThisLadyHunts]

I stated earlier ,and I still stand by it, that I have no issue with what you tell your kids about santa. The problem is with the lying aspect of it. They need to know that people lie. They are lied to when they turn on the tv. They are lied to when they go to school. I just wonder since you hate lying so much how you answer when your wife ask if she is prettier than her. Did the food taste good or a million other questions that the truth would not be in any ones best interest. If you ask me a serious question I will answer with the truth but not at the expense of devastating my loved ones feelings. (or going to jail )

Mr. doright is correct. My husband tells me I am the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen. Now, we both know it’s not true, but if I ever thought he was appreciating the beauty of another woman, I would rain all sorts of he** down his sorry a**.

But that’s just me.


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[ThisLadyHunts]

The sheer insanity of some of the crap people worry about is beyond my comprehension. Do you, raise your kids how you see fit, make a statement about how you raise your kids...and heck, even proclaim that your way is better than anyone else's, I don't care. But to make the claims that other parents choosing to encourage imagination, and that the innocence of believing in Santa Claus is "lying to your kids and teaching them to lie" is a wee bit of a stretch, to put it kindly...I'd rather be blunt about it, but I respect Michael, Mary, and the mods and don't care to cause unneeded issues on this thread

Kind? This is you being “kind”?


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[andre3k]

I agree with you, sir. Your original post was simply a question wrapped up in philosophical thoughts, not a statement of judgment. You mention that lies have become pervasive in today’s society. Based on some of the responses you’ve received, I would posit that defensiveness is also as pervasive and that combativeness—just for the sake of being combative—is the trend. It’s a poor reflection on how we, as a society, have evolved, that we can’t have a thoughtful and respectful debate without getting petty and personal.

That said, although the Bible instructs us “not to bear false witness,” I don’t believe that, in the spirit of this statement, that lying is forbidden absolutely. What if telling the absolute, unvarnished truth serves no other purpose than to bring pain to someone. For example, I see no harm in telling the mother of a son who died in combat while he was in the loo, that her son died heroically, if she asks. Or, if he was not well liked, what purpose does it serve to tell her that? Or, let’s say one person in a marriage made a tragic mistake and, years ago, cheated on the other, though it never happened again? What purpose would it serve to confess this to the spouse and ruin his/her perception of his/her world?

No, I believe the elevated and enlightened individual knows the difference between integrity and compassion, and when to apply each one. The person who always tells the absolute truth is like a bull in a china closet, stumbling through life while creating havoc while everything crashes around him.

And, no, those jeans don’t make your a** look fat at all.


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This is the type of response I was originally expecting. Thank you for taking the time to respond in the way that you did.

I think that we can be truthful in all things while keeping a persons feeling in consideration. It might require some careful thought, but it can be accomplished.

Let's take the classic example. Honey, do these jeans make my butt look big?
You might actually think that her butt does look big. Instead of saying that, you tell her I don't know about that but those jeans make you beautiful.

You can turn the situation around and respond without lying, you just have to think it out. If you can't respond without lying then don't respond. It's almost as if we have to re-train our mind to not lie because it has become so normal to tell a lie.

Santa Claus was a real person, he was St. Nicolaus, a priest that loved kids and gave all his money to the poor. Explain to children that is where the story of Santa Claus comes from and that over time it evolved into what we now see as Santa. No lies needed and they can still enjoy Christmas and everything that comes with it.

[CrownKiller14]

That's boring.

Give me a jolly flying fat man and reindeer with a glowing nose.

[TxDispatcher]

Kind? This is you being “kind”?


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Absolutely

[ThisLadyHunts]

Absolutely

((rolling my eyes))


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[rladner]

You can call it lying, you can call it pretending, but I believe intent has a lot to do with the true definition of a lie. For example, if you believe something and it is wrong, but you believe it to be correct, are you lying? No, you are just wrong. You have no intent to deceive. You can argue that the Santa Clause thing is all about deceit ,but I would argue it is more about pretend with no ill intent. I mean, heck, we all watch TV and Movies. What are TV and Movies? They are people pretending to be someone/something else. Is it lying? Are they sinning by pretending to be someone they are not? No, why? Cause there is no ill intent. It is for entertainment. Santa Clause is for pretend and there is no ill intent. Just like when you tell your wife the jeans don't make her butt look big. You are not lying (as I believe it is defined) cause you are not perpetrating ill intent.

You can take the "shall not bear false witness" very very literally or you can try to understand what the intent of that was. To me, it was to prevent harm and ill intents.

But, to each their own.

[AntlerCollector]

Why just pick on ole St. Nick?

What about the Easter bunny, Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Ironman, etc. etc. are they all “lies” to your children? Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck never really fought over whether or not is was rabbit or duck season because THEY AINT REAL! Scooby Doo could never solved a mystery no matter how many Scooby snacks you gave him. The real Elmer Fudd was a vegetarian and would never shoot a rabbit. A coyote can literally outrun a roadrunner.

All our childhoods have been a “lie.”


Leave Santa alone!

[Smart]

You can call it lying, you can call it pretending, but I believe intent has a lot to do with the true definition of a lie. For example, if you believe something and it is wrong, but you believe it to be correct, are you lying? No, you are just wrong. You have no intent to deceive. You can argue that the Santa Clause thing is all about deceit ,but I would argue it is more about pretend will no ill intent. I mean, heck, we all watch TV and Movies. What are TV and Movies? They are people pretending to be someone/something else. Is it lying? Are they sinning by pretending to be someone they are not? No, why? Cause there is no ill intent. It is for entertainment. Santa Clause is for pretend and there is no ill intent. Just like when you tell your wife the jeans don't make her butt look big. You are not lying (as I believe it is defined) cause you are not perpetrating ill intent.

You can take the "shall not bear false witness" very very literally or you can try to understand what the intent of that was. To me, it was to prevent harm and ill intents.

But, to each their own.

Well said......well said..

[ThisLadyHunts]

You can call it lying, you can call it pretending, but I believe intent has a lot to do with the true definition of a lie. For example, if you believe something and it is wrong, but you believe it to be correct, are you lying? No, you are just wrong. You have no intent to deceive. You can argue that the Santa Clause thing is all about deceit ,but I would argue it is more about pretend will no ill intent. I mean, heck, we all watch TV and Movies. What are TV and Movies? They are people pretending to be someone/something else. Is it lying? Are they sinning by pretending to be someone they are not? No, why? Cause there is no ill intent. It is for entertainment. Santa Clause is for pretend and there is no ill intent. Just like when you tell your wife the jeans don't make her butt look big. You are not lying (as I believe it is defined) cause you are not perpetrating ill intent.

You can take the "shall not bear false witness" very very literally or you can try to understand what the intent of that was. To me, it was to prevent harm and ill intents.

But, to each their own.

Well said.


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[C.Read]

.

[rowdybass]

My kids know that Christmas is about the birth of Jesus Christ and also believe or have believed in Santa.

You can have it both ways.


My daughter soon to be 13 knows Santa isn’t real but plays along because she doesn’t want to spoil the fun for her brother who is soon to be 10.

Not everything is black and white.


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This right here ^^^^