Serious question about hunting, kids, and marriage.

[Trevor73402]

DRT.....thank you for sharing that. A lot to be taken from it.

[yotethumper]

It just seems like men nowdays in the 25-40 year old age group seem to either be making a lot excuses for not being able to be outdooors, or they have wives that really are a bit too hard on them for wanting to enjoy their hobbies.

I can speak for the 25-34 year old age bracket. Simply put, most of us can't afford current prices in the hunting industry. The average salary for somebody in the 25-34 year old age bracket is only $41,951. 20-24 year old average salary is $29,770.

My wife and I are both in those age brackets and we make much more than the average household in our age bracket BUT a $5000 annual hunting expense just doesn't fit when we are trying to save up for our first home.

When my grandfather and uncles were growing up, they didn't have to spend $5K a year to hunt. They just hunted local ranches in exchange for firewood and chores.

Simply put, times have changed.

[jds247]

The only way I miss my kids school programs or a game they are playing in is if I have to work.. most of my time hunting alone is during the week when the kids are at school.. if it's a weekend hunt the oldest is with me.. I've never let hunting or fishing stop me from doing what needs to be done but my wife expects me to be hunting or fishing If I'm off work .. I wont attend a wedding during college football season and I dont do other peoples kids b day parties thsts for the wife to do..

[Hooverfb]

I can speak for the 25-34 year old age bracket. Simply put, most of us can't afford current prices in the hunting industry. The average salary for somebody in the 25-34 year old age bracket is only $41,951. 20-24 year old average salary is $29,770.

My wife and I are both in those age brackets and we make much more than the average household in our age bracket BUT a $5000 annual hunting expense just doesn't fit when we are trying to save up for our first home.

When my grandfather and uncles were growing up, they didn't have to spend $5K a year to hunt. They just hunted local ranches in exchange for firewood and chores.

Simply put, times have changed.

That's a good point too. Access to hunting has changed. Not that it cant be done as I mentioned with public land, but ain't the same.

[muddyfuzzy]

My wife was raised at the deer lease, so were my kids so I guess I just got lucky.

[gingib]

This may sounds insanely selfish but one of the reasons my kids don’t play any sports ( little league) is the fact the wife and I just don’t have time to be running them all over town for practice 2-3 nights a week till 8pm and to games all weekend. I have better things that we can do at a family besides sitting at a ball park watching people live through their children. I have friend I see on high school spending every weekend watching their kids play ball and virtually complaining about it. Call me selfish if you want but I had much rather spend my time and money hunting or fishing with my wife and kids than sitting at a ball field.




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They must also not be very good haha

[gingib]

In reading some of these posts I’m amazed at how women managed to raise kids “back in the day”. The men were working or farming or whatever all day every day they could and the women and kids did just fine. The greatest generation was part of that.

Women were created to bear, nurture and raise kids. Amazing how we’ve lost sight of that. The reality is fellas, they would be just fine and raise those kids whether we are around or not. I’m not saying as Dads and Grandads that we don’t need to be around because single parenthood is I believe a big part of societal problems today. But you can’t put your life completely on hold when you have a wife and kids. You still have to have your own time and interests as well.

There’s a great podcast about just that subject as well as others.

Orderofman.com


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Very true and great info. Some people will disagree because they have changed into letting their wife's control them

[MagicBlade]

I know there is a pretty broad age group of people on this board, so I feel like there will be some good discussion on this as I feel the responses will vary based upon age.

It seems that more and more I see/hear people talking about how they are not able to hunt/fish/be outdoors as much as they’d like due to having kids and a wife. I have two very good friends that I’ve known most of my life. They lease some property from me. It’s gotten to the point that I only see them 1-2 times a year now during deer season when they come up to camp. One lives 40 minutes away. The other lives about 90 minutes away. All I hear from them is how they can’t hunt due to kids and/or wife. They are just too busy.

My Dad was an avid outdoorsman. The day I was born, he was on Texoma hauling in stripers. Just weeks after I was born, I was in a Ranger boat strapped in a car seat on Toledo Bend while he caught bass. Anything that could be hunted, trapped, or fished for, he did it. For the most part, my dad worked a 40-50 hour a week job 5 days a week. Weekends were for hunting/fishing. That’s just how it was. Nobody complained about it. It was not a big deal. He was not an absent father. He didn’t neglect any home duties. But you sure as hell were not going to tell him he couldn’t go hunt/fish because of me or a wife. I started going hunting along side him when I was 7-8. I was fishing with him well before that.

It just seems like men nowdays in the 25-40 year old age group seem to either be making a lot excuses for not being able to be outdooors, or they have wives that really are a bit too hard on them for wanting to enjoy their hobbies. I’m not saying that all those men don’t enjoy spending time with their babies. It’s just never presented in that manner. It’s always “I’ve got kids and a wife so I don’t get to hunt much”. For the older crowd on here, men that would be my Dad’s age, I don’t feel like you all were the same way when you were “in your prime”. You did what you wanted and nobody gave you a hard time about it. You hunted when you wanted and that’s just how it was. The wife and kids were never an excuse or reason why you couldn’t be in the field.

I am not meaning this as a slam towards any at all. I’m just trying to get some understanding as to what is real vs guys just making excuses not to be outdoors.

While I hunt with my friends, my son & grandson when I want and how much I want.

What I don't understand why any of you care about anyone but yourselves!
I'm glad you all make the rules!

[Deerslayersh]

28 male, married with a 9-month old.

I definitely don't make it to the lease as often as I used to. Raising a kid is a lot of work, and I do not think it should be left to my wife. I strive to be as involved in taking care of my daughter as my wife is; I change just as many diapers, we split the 3-am shifts of rocking her back to sleep and feeding a bottle, I take care of her for the weekend if my wife goes out of town (and vice versa).

I've never understood the guy who uses the excuse that "raising a child is a woman's job" so that he can get out of the house and do whatever he wants. Marriage and Parenting is a partnership. Plus, I love taking care of and being around my daughter more than I do hunting. As soon as she's old enough to be at the deer lease, she will be there with me. Until then, I just won't get to hunt as much; but I'll always make time for my interests and hobbies and allow my wife to make time for hers.

[lodgepole]

28 male, married with a 9-month old.



I definitely don't make it to the lease as often as I used to. Raising a kid is a lot of work, and I do not think it should be left to my wife. I strive to be as involved in taking care of my daughter as my wife is; I change just as many diapers, we split the 3-am shifts of rocking her back to sleep and feeding a bottle, I take care of her for the weekend if my wife goes out of town (and vice versa).



I've never understood the guy who uses the excuse that "raising a child is a woman's job" so that he can get out of the house and do whatever he wants. Marriage and Parenting is a partnership. Plus, I love taking care of and being around my daughter more than I do hunting. As soon as she's old enough to be at the deer lease, she will be there with me. Until then, I just won't get to hunt as much; but I'll always make time for my interests and hobbies and allow my wife to make time for hers.

Good man, responsibility of parenting is a two way street. Both father and mother equally.


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[Bama]

I hate to miss my kids events soccer,basketball,volleyball,band ,plays and such. But to me the cost of hunting has gotten so high that the number of hunters is dwindling , I would imagine if the OP's dad had to pay 3k for a lease and pay for all the travel and other expenses with a lease he may not have been hunting near as much. I think times are changing on everything if kids sports cost my parents what I pay a year then I probably wouldn't have played as many as I did .
Anthony

[Hi-Lonesome]

I'm 36 and have been married for 11 years. We have 3 sons age 10, 7 & 1. I have learned that if the wife does not getting equal value in their hobbies then it will cause resentment. Especially when she sees or hears your off having fun while they are stuck at home with kids. The trick is to do your part as a husband and father so that they get equal time in what they love. Be there when they need you and provide for them so they are comfortable. You don't have to be a chained up dog but being a husband and father requires you to sacrifice your own selfish desires. Best advice is to make your plans in advance and make sure there are no conflicts. An understanding wife will make some schedule changes to the agenda so that her needs are taken care of and you get to do what you have your heart set on. Ive seen guys up and leave with their buddies and tell their wife to deal with it. Ive also seen wives that have their man by the balls and rule with an iron fist.

[Hi-Lonesome]

I can speak for the 25-34 year old age bracket. Simply put, most of us can't afford current prices in the hunting industry. The average salary for somebody in the 25-34 year old age bracket is only $41,951. 20-24 year old average salary is $29,770.

My wife and I are both in those age brackets and we make much more than the average household in our age bracket BUT a $5000 annual hunting expense just doesn't fit when we are trying to save up for our first home.

When my grandfather and uncles were growing up, they didn't have to spend $5K a year to hunt. They just hunted local ranches in exchange for firewood and chores.

Simply put, times have changed.

You are spot on.

[UrbanBuck]

I hear ya'.... or its "wife wont let me". Take your **** kids with you!!! If your wife won't let you go maybe you should get rid of her.... JUST SAYIN' ; )

[Deerslayersh]

I have learned that if the wife does not getting equal value in their hobbies then it will cause resentment. [...] You don't have to be a chained up dog but being a husband and father requires you to sacrifice your own selfish desires. .

+1 couldn’t agree more


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