Weddings? Who pays????

[westtexducks]

We just got married in June. We paid the majority of it out of our pockets. Her parents paid for 200 beers and my parents paid for the rehearsal dinner. Came out to the tune of around 12k even for 74 people and still feeding everyone and having most of the normal stuff.


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[Rick]

I guess I am wired different, there is no way I would spend 30-35K on a wedding (or even half of that), I would buy them a car first. When I got married (yes it was a long time ago), we spent $300 on a wedding rig set....still married, they have worked just fine. And no one thinks any less of us for being frugal in our choice.

[cva34]

It was

My wife and I got married in 2014. Her parents paid for the wedding, and mine paid for the rehearsal dinner. We were quite blessed that her parents are extremely conservative and old fashioned, and that she is an only child.

thats the way it was in my Experience....and I had 3 GURLS..1 boy....

In some cases the other party pitched in so talk with them MAYBE

[locolobo]

Depends on what the girl andher parents want and what you can afford.
First daughter, 19 yrs ago, we did the whole thing. We rented a hall where the wedding and reception were held, Had the dresses made by a friend who volunteered her time and had a friend cook the BBQ. The wife spent 2 days cooking sides before the wedding. We bought all the materials to produce these things. Whole thing cost us about 5 grand. SIL family paid nothing.
Jokingly told the second I would give her $2500 to elope when the time came. 5 years later she asked if the offer still stands. Preacher @ Their church did the deed in his office with me as a witness and they used the $ to help buy a house. SIL family paid nothing
Last one, last year, wanted a destination wedding in Costa Rica to the tune of $20G Plus airfare. Said "not no but #&!! no". And it was mainly because lots of family members on both sides would not be able to go. They did it anyway "on their dime". We went and it was a lovely sunrise wedding. We ended up giving them $8g to help with expenses. Don't know if SIL family helped with expenses.

[rut-ro]

Traditionally the bride family, more and more they are splitting it. The new thing now is to charge a cover charge for guest to attend weddings. Wedding prices have got crazy high. When you add the venue, food, liquor video and photography you could easily be over 50K in a hurry.

[AntlerCollector]

If they want y'all to split it then split it. Don't be a tightwad and make it an issue that's gonna divide the extended family before the kids ever get married. That's just stupid.

[DirtyDave]

LOL. I didn't know there was a rule on this. Written or not.
Fiance and I are paying for ours. If our parents chip-in, great. We are not asking for any money, but if they offer, I'm ok with it. But we aren't a couple of broke kids either

[Tony Pic]

I got married 29 years ago. Wifes parents paid for reception, my folks rehearsal dinner. Wife and I paid photogs,limos,favors and flowers.
My oldest boy is getting married in Sept 2020. They are splitting the cost with her parents and I guess we got the rehearsal dinner.
I think it is a waste of money, big weddings. Buy a home with the money.
We have 3 sons , so maybe I am different than having a daughter who always wanted that dream wedding.

[chrisk]

My Mom&Dad,Mother-in-Law,Father-in-Law and sisters gave us money for our honeymoon which paid for a Chalet in Tennessee. The wedding and reception was paid by us. I was happy they did what they did but it wasn’t expected and they meant it as a surprise.

[TxAg]

The kids should pay for it themselves

Why is it the parents' responsibility

[Lungbustr]

How old are they?

They can always pay for it if they want a big wedding. The JP is cheap and this ain't no fairytale.

Me and my wife paid for our own and our folks chipped in a little. I want to say we spent 12k or so for a very nice wedding. That was about the max I wanted to spend. This is for two grown ups with great jobs and finances.

We got married at my uncle's very nice house waterfront house overlooking the bay. I built the wedding arch. Friends did the barbecue we bought the meat and drinks. Hired a DJ. Rented several large tents and tables chairs etc. My ex that is a professional photographer cut me a deal on the photography end. Got married by the chaplain that works with my wife. It was a whole lot of work but my wife was happy and it was extremely nice for the price.

Kids have really gotten out of hand these days with all this 40 to 50 thousand dollar fairytale wedding nonsense.

[DirtyDave]

Me personally? I'd take take out a loan,if I had to.At least offer to split it up.That's just how I'm wired.One thing I ain't ever gonna be called is a cheap M***********r.

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If you can't pay cash for a wedding, you can't afford it.
Sounds Crazy to me to borrow money for a wedding. That is a terrible way to start off a marriage.
My Fiance is getting the wedding I can afford in CASH. Nothing more. If she wasn't ok with that, there is no reason to have a wedding.

I know people that have had $100k+ weddings and the marriage didn't last a year. Can't get that money back LOL.

[MRWHITE87]

Glad I have sons because I'll raise them knowing that I don't believe in such frivolousness. If your kids already know what's up, this problem never arises.
My wife and I got married at the court with 1 witness and went for burgers after. We are regularly reminded why we are happy to have saved a ton of money.

Should my boys wanna get married to a high maintenance princess, then she's YOUR maintenance, not mine. Hopefully she hasn't got sisters and/or her parents have EFF YOU money.

I couldn't care less if someone calls me a "cheap mother effer."

[aggie2000tx]

I guess it depends on the wedding. 20-30k for a wedding is just stupid in my opinion. I have a daughter and I can assure you I am not going to spend any where near that.

The the daughter parents want to have this fancy wedding and invite all these people they can foot the bill for that. If they are insisting you split then I would definitely set a limit on what you are willing to pay

[Lungbustr]

If you can't pay cash for a wedding, you can't afford it.
Sounds Crazy to me to borrow money for a wedding. That is a terrible way to start off a marriage.
My Fiance is getting the wedding I can afford in CASH. Nothing more. If she wasn't ok with that, there is no reason to have a wedding.

I know people that have had $100k+ weddings and the marriage didn't last a year. Can't get that money back LOL.

I know several still paying on the wedding and they are divorced now.