Weddings? Who pays????

[Graysonhogs]

Traditionally the bride family, more and more they are splitting it. The new thing now is to charge a cover charge for guest to attend weddings. Wedding prices have got crazy high. When you add the venue, food, liquor video and photography you could easily be over 50K in a hurry.

Man, people have no problem asking for money these days. LOL

Saw a gofund me the other day "Truck needs a transmission, please help."

[6.5 shooter]

Split it and get it over with.

[IvoryRoot]

My wife’s parents insisted on paying for ours 12 years ago. They spent 35k and later I found out they would have given us that for a down payment on a house if my wife would’ve settled for a small wedding. Personally, I feel like it is crazy to have a wedding that cost that much. I didn’t have any say so in the wedding, nor did I care but watching the process there was a lot of keeping up with the Jones’s.

[kyle1974]

Weddings? Who pays????

This isn’t the caste system in India. Costs should be split. I say this as the father of two girls and two boys.

However, there should be some agreement as to what is reasonable. If a princess has always dreamed of ice sculptures and $200 per plate meals, then there should be a conversation about setting a budget.

[duckmanep]

I think splitting is okay as long as you are in the whole budgeting process.

[BBReezen]

Oh that’s just her parents making excuses to be a bunch of heap asses. They have had her whole life to save up to pay for her wedding. Not a good sign for your son, she may have inherited their genes

I’m just joking. I paid for our wedding, it wasn’t much but everyone said it was way more fun than other weddings they had been at. Congrats to you all and don’t let the wedding costs divide what is really happening that day.

[Gclyde28]

Got married in January. Brides family paid for everything wedding related and my family paid for everything rehearsal related.

The only times I have heard of the groom's side pitching in on the wedding side is when the grooms family was wealthier and wanted a much larger wedding than the bride had planned so they paid some to accommodate all the guests they wanted to invite or all the upgrades they wanted.

[barnett77859]

have the wedding at your church and the reception at the church do both familes a favor save money to help with honeymoon and living cost

[JHT]

They are not even married and they are already fighting about money.
Not good at all.

OP, your in a tough spot for sure. Maybe you could meet your son's future father in law out for a beer/coffee. Just the two of you. Come up with a number both of you are willing to contribute and say that's it. Tell him this is also the new tradition in throwing weddings.

You might want to do this soon so the kids will know what their budget is.

My gut tells me your getting taken advantage of but you could nip it in the bud by setting a max that your willing to contribute.

Good luck.

[DallasCoon12]

My daughter got married in January. Our family paid for the entire wedding. My son-n-law's family paid for nothing. Each situation is different but traditionally the bride's family pays for the wedding. This is still practiced the majority of the time from what I see. If the bride's family has financial difficulty doing this, and the groom's family has the money and offers, then there is nothing wrong with that.

This^

[Sleepy]

My wife didn’t want a wedding. We paid $35 at the local courthouse. Don’t regret it!

[KDinTX]

My wife’s parents insisted on paying for ours 12 years ago. They spent 35k and later I found out they would have given us that for a down payment on a house if my wife would’ve settled for a small wedding. Personally, I feel like it is crazy to have a wedding that cost that much. I didn’t have any say so in the wedding, nor did I care but watching the process there was a lot of keeping up with the Jones’s.

Got married in 2011, same deal, they offered my wife 30k cash and a small wedding, or 30k for a wedding. Would you believe she didnt take the cash....... Course I didnt find out about this until after..... She's said multiple times since that she should have just taken the cash, but then she wanted a big wedding.

[RJH1]

It will depend on your finances. When our son got married we did the rehearsal dinner, some other stuff and said, "here is X amount of dollars, and that is what we can afford." I would almost guarantee the brides family paid more, but not a ton more. The wedding was nice, but not extravagant and was even self catered to put money where they wanted it more.

I would set a budget that you can afford and do all you can, no reason to go in debt, but also no reason to be a cheap ******* either haha. And when i say do all you can, I mean physically, help serve the food, help clean up, etc., you can save a bunch of money and still have a good time.

Your kid should only get married once, why not do all you can? And this coming from a guy that was broke and got married at the JP, but I know my wife would have liked to have a small wedding, but we had no help, so that was not an option.

[Dale Moser]

Weddings are stupid.

I'll get my son through college debt free, and I'll pay for a PARTY when he gets married. He can figure out the rest. I won't spend 10k plus for some young lady to try to live out a fairy tale fantasy.

[Parramore]

Our wedding was 17K after it was all said and done. My wife and I supported the entire en devour and did not ask for anything. My folks paid for the reception because they volunteered to help out so we let them. Her folks gave us 3K and said that will be all. The rest was on us and it was greatness. I have two daughters and if the future other side of the family they think I will be paying outright for two weddings, hahaha, then they got another thing coming. It should be 50/50 up to a point or a said dollar amount. Making the family of the bride pay for it all is archaic.