your most embarrassing moments?

[waterspiderpd27]

This was my brother's story...not me.

He was behind an ambulance and a small yeti cooler fell out of an open side compartment. He stopped, grabbed the cooler and tried to catch up to the ambulance. He lost it. He called the FD and explained what happened. They put him on hold and then said they just checked all the ambulances and they weren't missing anything.

My brother says screw it and decides to keep it. He gets home to show his wife and they open it up and there are 3 human toes on ice! Oops!

He should have called the toetruck!!!

[Chew]

Thanks for ruining the set up punch!

[Thayden2]

I was laying in my wife's (girlfriend of 3 weeks at the time) bed the morning after we had gone out while she was taking a shower when the DADS (day after drinking sh*ts) decided to make a surprise attack. My stomach started rumbling and I knew immediately a crisis was at hand.

I thought to myself, there's no way I could make it back to my place in time so I asked how much longer she would be. "15-20 minutes" was her reply. I think to myself I got this, I can hold out. A few minutes goes by and now the rumble is getting lower and I know that I indeed do not "got this" and cannot "hold out", so I roll out of bed and do the duck walk down the hall to check her room mates doors hoping one of them is not there and I could dispatch this demon without anyone knowing. Well as luck would have it, all doors are locked, everyone is home and plan A has gone to sh*t.

Onto plan B. The pool restroom. I was certain it would be open, even if it was further than I thought I could safely make it. Well, I opened the front door which over looked the pool and saw nothing on and everything locked up tight. I failed to realized it was Sunday morning and it would not be open until later in the day.

Plan C. The ninja. At this point the rumble has reach as far down as it could go and I now realize that this train ain't stopping! I think to myself maybe I could sneak in while shes still in the shower and "quietly" mitigate this problem. I slowly and quietly open the bath room door and sneak in. The plan is starting out good, but as I make my approach to the toilet I lose my balance and crash onto the seat. She calls my name and ask whats going on. I started to say something, but it was rudely interrupted by an uncontrollable and by no means "quite" explosion. She peaks from around the curtain only be smacked in the face by the smell of which I can't even describe, and retreats quickly back.

I thought for certain that would be the end of us, but to my surprise and luck it wasn't. She ended up saying yes when I proposed a few months down the road, and we've now been married for more than 12 years!

[Jspradley]

I was laying in my wife's (girlfriend of 3 weeks at the time) bed the morning after we had gone out while she was taking a shower when the DADS (day after drinking sh*ts) decided to make a surprise attack. My stomach started rumbling and I knew immediately a crisis was at hand.

I thought to myself, there's no way I could make it back to my place in time so I asked how much longer she would be. "15-20 minutes" was her reply. I think to myself I got this, I can hold out. A few minutes goes by and now the rumble is getting lower and I know that I indeed do not "got this" and cannot "hold out", so I roll out of bed and do the duck walk down the hall to check her room mates doors hoping one of them is not there and I could dispatch this demon without anyone knowing. Well as luck would have it, all doors are locked, everyone is home and plan A has gone to sh*t.

Onto plan B. The pool restroom. I was certain it would be open, even if it was further than I thought I could safely make it. Well, I opened the front door which over looked the pool and saw nothing on and everything locked up tight. I failed to realized it was Sunday morning and it would not be open until later in the day.

Plan C. The ninja. At this point the rumble has reach as far down as it could go and I now realize that this train ain't stopping! I think to myself maybe I could sneak in while shes still in the shower and "quietly" mitigate this problem. I slowly and quietly open the bath room door and sneak in. The plan is starting out good, but as I make my approach to the toilet I lose my balance and crash onto the seat. She calls my name and ask whats going on. I started to say something, but it was rudely interrupted by an uncontrollable and by no means "quite" explosion. She peaks from around the curtain only be smacked in the face by the smell of which I can't even describe, and retreats quickly back.

I thought for certain that would be the end of us, but to my surprise and luck it wasn't. She ended up saying yes when I proposed a few months down the road, and we've now been married for more than 12 years!

She passed a literal sh*t test!

[Duckologist]

I was laying in my wife's (girlfriend of 3 weeks at the time) bed the morning after we had gone out while she was taking a shower when the DADS (day after drinking sh*ts) decided to make a surprise attack. My stomach started rumbling and I knew immediately a crisis was at hand.

I thought to myself, there's no way I could make it back to my place in time so I asked how much longer she would be. "15-20 minutes" was her reply. I think to myself I got this, I can hold out. A few minutes goes by and now the rumble is getting lower and I know that I indeed do not "got this" and cannot "hold out", so I roll out of bed and do the duck walk down the hall to check her room mates doors hoping one of them is not there and I could dispatch this demon without anyone knowing. Well as luck would have it, all doors are locked, everyone is home and plan A has gone to sh*t.

Onto plan B. The pool restroom. I was certain it would be open, even if it was further than I thought I could safely make it. Well, I opened the front door which over looked the pool and saw nothing on and everything locked up tight. I failed to realized it was Sunday morning and it would not be open until later in the day.

Plan C. The ninja. At this point the rumble has reach as far down as it could go and I now realize that this train ain't stopping! I think to myself maybe I could sneak in while shes still in the shower and "quietly" mitigate this problem. I slowly and quietly open the bath room door and sneak in. The plan is starting out good, but as I make my approach to the toilet I lose my balance and crash onto the seat. She calls my name and ask whats going on. I started to say something, but it was rudely interrupted by an uncontrollable and by no means "quite" explosion. She peaks from around the curtain only be smacked in the face by the smell of which I can't even describe, and retreats quickly back.

I thought for certain that would be the end of us, but to my surprise and luck it wasn't. She ended up saying yes when I proposed a few months down the road, and we've now been married for more than 12 years!

Dang I thought everyone did that on purpose. It was one of my tests to see who was genuine or not. If some chic walked out because of my gut bomb I didn't need her anyway. I'd load up on cabbage, beer and boiled eggs for test day

[Thayden2]

She passed a literal sh*t test!

With flying colors

Dang I thought everyone did that on purpose. It was one of my tests to see who was genuine or not. If some chic walked out because of my gut bomb I didn't need her anyway. I'd load up on cabbage, beer and boiled eggs for test day

Ha, oh the test would have happened eventually, just didn't plan on conducting it only 3 weeks in

[kruppa24]

I posted just one of many on here about six months ago. Women are cruel and mean. Dang dog.

Me and Meathead - YouTube

Thanks for the laugh!

[bps3040]

I had a colonoscopy done my freshman year in high school... I’m getting prepped they roll me into the room for procedure, and as theyre going over everything they say they will have some students studying that will be shadowing. I’m thinking like med students from a college nope right as they start giving me sedation meds 6 senior girls from my high school that I very much know stroll in... then Zzzzzzzzzz

I had something similar happen. Except I was awake for every embarrassing moment. My wife and I were trying to have a baby and my count was a little low. So, they decide to test my boys.... want to check for varicose veins. Well, that entails an ultrasound.
So, I am all laid out on table and they are ultrasounding my boys.... there is a knock on door, Doc looks at me and says “by the way, we are a teaching hospital, I hope you don’t mind” and smiles at me.
10-12 college girls walk in! I about crapped. So for rest of test they were all there, getting an eyeful.


A wise man’s heart inclines to the right, but the heart of a fool to the left.
Ecclesiastes 10:2

[jsctx84]

I got a 2nd one.

Hs gf and I decided to take a shower together while her mom was away. She took me to her mother's bathroom I guess because it was a bigger shower. We arent 5 min I to the shower when her mom comes knocking on the door saying she needed in the bathroom real quick and had to leave again quickly.

She whispered just stay here and she got out and left me there naked in her mom's shower. Her mom came in the bathroom and I was shaking with fear trying to silent and go unnoticed.

Few min later it seems she has left so I speak out the curtain to see her mom naked on the bed reading a book. My gf knocked on the door several times to distract her and try to get her to come out so I could escape.

Next thing I know I see her arm reach through the curtain and start the shower. I knew I was done for at this point but still didn't have the nerve to come out.

She enters the shower and I buckle up and she sees me and in the calmest voice she just says... is the water too cold ?

A week later she was seated in my section at a restaurant I served at with a table of like 10 people and she told them all this story as i stood there and listened
. Was probably one of the most if not most embarrassing time of my life.
On the plus side her mom had a pretty good boob job.

This sounds like a missed opportunity

[TX03RUBI]

I wasn’t embarrassed by this story at the time, but had there not been alcohol involved I **** sure would’ve been. This took place about a month ago on the opening day of pheasant season.

Me and 5 buddies headed up north to go pheasant hunting for the day, and 4 of us got a hotel in Amarillo for that Saturday night. We could’ve made the drive back to Lubbock, but figured we had a good excuse for a guys night out on the town. We finish up hunting, go grab a bite to eat and a few beers, then head to the hotel to clean up a little. We weren’t going to do anything wild, but we were going to tie one on a little bit. So I get an Uber headed our way, and we all head downstairs with a solid 6-8 drinks in each of us.

As we’re getting downstairs I feel my gut start to rumble something fierce. Being in my somewhat inebriated state I think it’s a great idea to hold on to it, and save it for the Uber ride. So my gut tears me up for a few more minutes, but I manage to hold on to it. We get in the Uber minivan, and as soon as I sit down I slowly and silently began to release the gut bomb of all gut bombs. I’m dying of laughter internally, but I didn’t break a peep. My nostrils are burning and I’m gagging secretly l. It was horrendous to say the least. We make the full 5 minute ride to the bar, and then we exit the Uber without so much as a peep ever said about the fouls odor filling the ride.

We sit down at the bar a few minutes later, and I can’t hold back anymore. I burst out in laughter and ask everyone how they didn’t smell that. That’s when everyone admits to doing the same thing. They were all waiting for someone else to burst out from their rank odor, but everyone was being quiet so as to not give themselves away. That poor Uber driver

[Jspradley]

I wasn’t embarrassed by this story at the time, but had there not been alcohol involved I **** sure would’ve been. This took place about a month ago on the opening day of pheasant season.

Me and 5 buddies headed up north to go pheasant hunting for the day, and 4 of us got a hotel in Amarillo for that Saturday night. We could’ve made the drive back to Lubbock, but figured we had a good excuse for a guys night out on the town. We finish up hunting, go grab a bite to eat and a few beers, then head to the hotel to clean up a little. We weren’t going to do anything wild, but we were going to tie one on a little bit. So I get an Uber headed our way, and we all head downstairs with a solid 6-8 drinks in each of us.

As we’re getting downstairs I feel my gut start to rumble something fierce. Being in my somewhat inebriated state I think it’s a great idea to hold on to it, and save it for the Uber ride. So my gut tears me up for a few more minutes, but I manage to hold on to it. We get in the Uber minivan, and as soon as I sit down I slowly and silently began to release the gut bomb of all gut bombs. I’m dying of laughter internally, but I didn’t break a peep. My nostrils are burning and I’m gagging secretly l. It was horrendous to say the least. We make the full 5 minute ride to the bar, and then we exit the Uber without so much as a peep ever said about the fouls odor filling the ride.

We sit down at the bar a few minutes later, and I can’t hold back anymore. I burst out in laughter and ask everyone how they didn’t smell that. That’s when everyone admits to doing the same thing. They were all waiting for someone else to burst out from their rank odor, but everyone was being quiet so as to not give themselves away. That poor Uber driver

If you were in Amarillo it probably improved the smell...

[Still Hunter]

So.. Freshman in College, took a weightlifting class as an BS Elective. Of course it was a Co-Ed Class. Some absolutely gorgeous girls in my class. I started dating one of them and would pick her up at her dorm. So we are at the end of the Semester and everyone is doing their " Max" to see how much they had improved. So I am doing my max squat for three reps. I have two spotters , one on each side. Mirrors all around the weight room of course. I load it up and I am really trying to max out these three reps. First squat I get right down to the bottom of my squat and my gym shorts rip completely apart and out fly the boys. My spotters literally fall out cracking up laughing and are no longer spotting, I am stuck at the bottom of the squat with all that weight trying not to collapse and also trying to gain composure enough to finish the rep. Meanwhile the whole gym is looking at the boys from all mirrors. I managed to get the squat back up and on the rack and I just turned and walked out totally embarrassed, face burning red from embarrassment with the entire gym erupting in laughter. I did not go back in. Later that day I go by the dorm to pick her up. Well back then the girls would all crowd the lobby to all watch some Soap Opera, "Days of our lives" or something. So I walk in and ask the desk to ring her and let her know I was there and of course two of the girls in the weight lifting class are in the lobby. So the entire lobby of girls all stand up and give me a round of applause. I was mortified. The Gym was bad enough. I never picked her up in the lobby again.

[stingerslinger]

Back in my umpiring days ...Montezuma Revenge hit me during a high school baseball game. Had to stop the game while I headed to the bathroom. Got a standing ovation when I resumed my position behind the plate.