Ok, over the years I have seen or had many things happen that had me or someone else laughing pretty hard. I have a bunch of stories from many years. So I am going to post up as many as possible. Anyone who wants to add some stories, add them.
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a buddy of mine in highschool fell asleep one afternoon while deer hunting. He was sitting on the ground against a big oak tree. He slept for quite a while and awoke to full darkness. He couldn't orient himself to place or time and got panicky for several minutes before remembering where he was.
Dummy did it again several years later in a different place.
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One of my favorite stories, happened back in the mid 90s. My mother's ex-husband, who was a not the nicest of people on many occasions but could be very nice on other occasions. Back in the later 80s and through much of the 90s, he made a lot of money. He had a business, buying and selling used drilling rigs and pieces, mainly drill pipe. I helped with that business for many years.
Something you always had to remember about him, was you never made fun of him, laughed at him or played any jokes on him. If you did, he would go ballistic, I would not be surprised if he actually killed someone over such things, he really got that mad.
So during the 90s, he got back into shooting shotguns, he was actually very good, he started off shooting sporting clays, did very well won a lot of matches. Then went on and shot skeet, but did not like skeet as much, then went back to shooting trap. He won a lot of trap matches, won the national championship I think twice. Basically he was very good. I never really got into shooting shotguns and that made him dislike me even more. I am into shooting rifles or pistols long range, I love precision shooting rifles and pistols. I see shotguns as just something to do for cheap entertainment.
So my mother's husband, started off buying Benellis and Browings. Then some Winchester 101 Pigeon grade guns. Then eventually bought a Krieghoff, that was the top of the line, best of the best. But here is the funny part. He would shoot a perfect score at a match with a $1000 Browning, but would miss two or three shots with his $15,000 Krieghoff. He would get so ****** off, many people who knew him gave him hell, me at the top of that list. He insisted on shooting Krieghoffs but did not shoot them as well. He eventually had a custom Kreighoff built specifically for him. It cost something like $50,000 to $52,000. He would still shoot better with the $1000 Browning. I had to be careful what I said on the subject, he would blow his top very quickly.
So there is some background info on him. I actually find that info pretty funny, if you knew him personally it was funny. Now to the story.
One day, a friend of the family who was a high ranking Sherriff's deputy, asked if we wanted to go shoot some dove. We said sure, sounds like fun. The deputy, was a lot of fun to be around, always had some good stories, great guy, very big guy.
So we all get loaded up and go over to a pasture on the edge of town, turns out the property had been bought by a developer and was going to be turned into a shopping center someday.
So there is one stock tank out in the middle of the pasture, it has very high banks, with mesquite around the banks. The banks are also fairly steep. So the three of us, each pick a side of the tank and hide in the mesquite.
Well the deputy and I started killing birds pretty quickly. We were having a good time. My mother's husband, was down on one end and not killing a **** thing, with his $52,000 Krieghoff. So we were giving him crap about how the gun only worked on clays and not real birds. That had him fuming. Here is a two time national trap champion and multi time Sporting Clays champion, not killing crap and the two that just like to get out and shoot birds every once in a while are killing the crap out of birds.
Well the deputy and I both saw some dove coming in, we yelled out to my mother's husband, they were coming to him, he was looking up trying to find them. They did not come out of a trap house, so he had no idea where they were. So he is standing on the very top of the bank of the tank, pointing the gun straight up, looking straight up, spinning around in a circle, looking for the birds. Well about the second spin, he stepped off the side of the top of the bank. Then went tumbling down the tall bank, with the $52,000 Krieghoff. As he tumbled, the gun went off once, about half way down the bank, then a second time right as he hit the water. He rolled right out into the pond, wound up about six feet out in the pond, in about 3 ft to 4 ft of water. He stood up soaked, both the deputy and I busted up laughing so hard, it was not possible to not laugh. He looked around saw me and gave me a look like he was about to shoot me. But then remembered the deputy was there and knocked it off. He probably would have shot at me, had the deputy not been there. We got one hell of a laugh out of that.
Well he finally made his way back up the steep bank, $52,000 Krieghoff covered in pond water and mud. He got to the top of the bank, wiped the gun down, looked it over, decided it was ok. Then we went back to hunting. The deputy and I killed a few more birds, but it was hard, because we were still laughing. My mother's husband finally killed a couple of dove, both landed out in the pond. He looked at us like we should go get them. We both shouted out, you are already wet, you go get them. He eventually waded out and got both birds and that was the end of our greatest dove hunt. We found out a $52,000 Krieghoff will kill dove, when the shooter can find them.
I will have many more stories later, my wife said we have to go Christmas tree shopping. Since I have given plenty of info on my mother's ex-husband, I won't need to post that info up again for future stories, there are more.Comment
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About a month ago I was running late and I didn't do my normal pre-hunt "prep". An hour later in the blind watching a mix of 6 does and young bucks, coffee kicked in hard.Comment
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That is funny. Always nice if nobody ACTUALLY gets shot in the making of a story.
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Ok, I’ve got one hellova story that happened recently and I’ll share but I’ll try and keep it short. (The more description though the better the experience LOL).
So, me and two of my buddies were on a ranch where my brother n law (who is a criminal) lived. During the summer time we spoke to the landowner and he allowed us to do a little axis hunting with my BIL and so we did. I shot a nice little spike and after realizing we hadn’t made a skinning rack, decided to just skin and quarter him on the tailgate of my truck. Now here I am, knife in hand, skinning this deer and I’m about 3/4 of the way finished with just a front leg and part of the neck to skin out when the landowner starts driving down the hill toward us. My buddy has one hand on a rear leg and I have one on a front leg and the other on my knife. My BIL, who had a few beers by now looks at us with wide eyes and shouts “ITS THE LANDOWNER HIDE THE DEER!” Now remember, he is a criminal and has a criminal type mind. Why he freaked out is because if you’re a criminal, you pretty much assume that everything you do is wrong even when you’re right. We HAD permission to hunt and I got that permission myself so when he looked at my buddy and shouted, my buddy had a moment to say the least. He violently yanked the carcass OUT OF MY HAND! He went sprinting down the hill toward the garage which was directly in front of the landowners car! He’s a rather round guy so watching him, in complete disbelief hauling his big arse down that hill with a flailing, half skinned deer flopping and flying behind him was........absolutely shocking. My poor buddy takes a flying leap behind the garage RIGHT INTO a huge patch of cactus and the carcass lands directly on top of him. I literally laughed so hard I peed myself. Afterwords I asked why in God’s name would he react that way knowing full well my BIL is an idiot and we had permission. His answer: “I have no idea.” As he picked cactus from his entire body LOL!
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My dad has a good one he likes to tell. One day he was hunting deer in upstate New York. It was very cold that day so he took some warm soup with him in a thermos. He did not hunt out of a stand back then but found a nice spot. After a short time he started to get cold and decided it was time to warm up by eating his soup. This was a particularly cold day, so cold that a nice deer got a whiff of the soup and decided he needed to find the source. This deer wanted the soup badly as he was so cold. He kept approaching my father and he kept having to push him away with the gun.
He tells it much better.........Comment
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Originally posted by mmlreiner View Post
I have seen people do stupid stuff like that, very funny.Comment
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Another one, years ago, my brother and I were hunting on top of a hill, on a ranch outside of Boerne. I was all cammoed up, head net, ect, had cover up sent on. My brother was also all cammoed up. We were sitting near the top of the hill. Looking around, hoping to find a big buck that had been seen on that hill a couple of times. The hills on that ranch, have very steep sides and flat tops. Years ago, the cleared the tops and left the dense cedar on the sides of the hills. Since then mesquite and cedar trees have sprouted up on the tops of the hills.
So we were sitting there looking for this big buck, I caught some movement down the side of the hill, in the area, where the big buck had been seen twice before. So I was moving very slowly to get the binoculars on it to see what it was. The deer was moving through some mesquite, that were growing near the line, where the brush had been cleared to years ago. The deer turned out to be a young buck, he was feeding and moving slowly through the mesquite. I had my T/C Contender with me. My brother had his Kleinguenther in 7mm-08.
We had been on the hill most of the day, seen a few doe, some cattle and that was about it, till the young buck showed up. That was the first buck we had seen all day, we were bored. I got a bright idea, told my brother to stay put. I snuck around the top of the hill, out of sight. I went around to the opposite side of the hill the buck was on. Then went down the top of the hill, will I got to the brush line. I got just inside the brush line and started working my way back around the hill, to the side where the buck was. I slowed way down, once I could see the buck. Then started working like a cat. Basically I only took steps when the buck had his head down eating. When he would pick his head up and look around, I would freeze. I kept this up for a while, I was able to close the gap to about 30 yards, pretty easily. Then I had to get serious, with the stalk. I kept up with the only moving when the buck had his head down eating and was able to stalk within about 15 yards of the buck, staying in the mesquite trees. I was coming up from behind the buck. Somewhere around 15 yards, the buck knew something was up, but he could not smell me and could not figure out what I was, by looking at me and I stayed frozen every time he tried looking around. He started walking away from me. I kept the stalk going, but had to take longer steps to keep the buck from increasing the distance. He tried to act like he was not concerned, but he knew something was wrong, but could not figure out what. He would stop and eat, but would then walk away from me. So I had to keep taking the long slow, quiet steps to close the gap. Well I finally close the gap to 10 yards or less. But at that time, the buck walked out of the mesquite brush, we ran out of brush. So he was in the open, standing on two legs in the open, there is not much chance, that the deer would not figure out exactly what I was very quickly. So I decided I had to make my move quickly.
Your thinking what move? My thought also, I was not sure I could get that close to the buck. At that point, that was my thought, what should I do?
So as the buck walked out away from the mesquite, obviously looking back at me, with his head held up high, facing mostly forwards, but I could see he was looking back towards me with his right eye. So I decided it was time to make my move and took off running after the deer. The buck jumped up and took off running. He looked almost more like a mule deer, he was not running flat out like a typical whitetail, he was jumping up or hopping and going forwards. I assume it's a strategy to make it harder for predators to be able to latch on and bring them down. So I am running as fast as I can, the buck is running, but launching himself upwards on each stride. So I am right on his tail, almost able to grab the buck, then realized, I was getting pelted with something. Then realized that every time the deer jumped, he was straying deer pellets out and hitting me in the chest. I chased the buck over the hill and down the other side, till we hit a area, that had a lot of loose large flat rocks. I felt my feet going every which direction and realized I was about to eat rock very soon. By this time the buck had turned on the afterburner and quit with the springing upwards and just took off. I wound up sliding, kind of surfing down the hill side a ways on a couple of large flat rocks, dang near ate it bad.
The whole time my younger brother was on the top of the hill laughing very hard. I was laughing as I was running, once I realized the deer was pelting me with deer pellets. I literally scared the crap out of him. Nobody or any deer were hurt, so it was all good. We called it a day and gave up on the big buck and went back to the truck.Comment
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Mine involves a wild turkey, that stood his ground when I tried to grab him by the neck. Long story and I don't want to try and type it on my phone.Comment
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These are greatComment
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Another story from the same ranch.
My best friend, wanted to go hunting, so we made plans. He asked if his wife could go also, I said sure no problem. He had already killed a nice 9 point that year and I think a 9 point the year before, or a 9 and a 10, don't remember. Back then good hill country bucks did not happen often. His bigger deer scored 144, enough at the time to make the Texas Hill country section of the record book.
So when they showed up, he told me he wanted to get his wife a buck, I said no problem we can do that. Then he said, I really want to get her a really nice buck. I said ok, I don't have a problem with that. I know of at least two very nice bucks, if we can find them, they would make for some nice wall hangers.
So they got in my truck and we took off. I started telling them about this huge buck I had seen once before. It would be one hell of a south Texas buck, but this thing was roaming around the hill country. I had seen it twice before, I had figured out it was coming from across the road. Where you came into this ranch, was down in the valley of the tall hills. Then you had to climb the hills either on the east side of the ranch or the west side. The hills were very steep and the two roads to the top, zigzagged back and forth up the side of the hills. So we are driving along and I am telling the story of this big buck I had seen. About that time, we get to the base of the hill and start working our way up. As we get about a quarter of the way up, there is a area, where you can see all the way to the top of the hill. Very close to the top, there was a huge oak tree, very large diameter trunk, but overall from one side to the other the tree was huge, the limbs hung low to the ground most of the way around the tree. As I am driving and telling the story of this big buck I look up the hill and see a very big buck standing under the big oak on the top of the hill. I casually tell them, you better get ready, we are going to go around this big curve, then up the hill and then turn again, then straight again and when we make that last straight section, we are going to be in a spot where you will be able to see up under that big oak. There is a huge buck under the oak. I told them as soon as I tell you to, jump out of the truck, find a place to rest the rifle and shoot. The buck will be under the big oak. I calmly said this, right in the middle of telling the story about the huge buck. From the looks on their faces, I don't think they really believed me that there was a huge buck under the oak tree on top of the hill.
The hill was steep enough, the only way you could see up it in the one stop, I saw the buck from, was to be sitting in the driver's seat, anywhere else in the cab, all you were going to see was sky and hill side. I did not want them sitting in my lap to see the buck, so I just told them to get ready to shoot.
So they are both looking at me, like what are you talking about. I told them again, be ready to jump out and shoot quickly, when I tell you, don't worry about anything else, just shoot the deer.
So we get up near the top of the hill, come around the last curve and then up a bit higher and come out probably 70 yards from this huge oak tree, with a huge buck under it, nothing else around. I stopped and told them to get out and shoot the buck, before he takes off. They got binoculars out and started looking at the buck. Then decided they did not want to shoot the deer, they really wanted to get her a nice deer. I looked at them and said, trust me, there are no bigger deer than that one, just get out and shoot it. They looked some more and said, I think we are going to pass. The buck had his head and most of his rack up in the low hanging limbs of the oak. The problem was, you could only see about 13" or so of width of his rack, for some strange reason, it looked like the buck was some little 13" spread six point. I kept telling them, if you don't like the buck when you get over to it, I will worry about what to do with the deer, just shoot it. They looked at me like what are you trying to get us to do, we don't want to shoot a little buck.
At the time I had used all four of my buck tags. I had used all four of my tags up weeks ago, before I saw that buck the first time.
Well eventually the buck decided he did not know what was going on, but he was getting out of there. So he lowered his head down out of the low hanging oak limbs, then turned and took off trotting with his head down to clear the oak limbs. At that point, my buddy and his wife, both had their jaws on the floor of the truck. I sat there and said, did not tell you, to shoot the **** deer? At that time, they were both trying to open the same door at the same time and get out of the truck. They finally got the door open, then they both fell out of the truck. My buddy landed on top of his wife, then there was a confusion over who was going to hold the rifle and shoot the deer. My buddy naturally tried to get the rifle and shoot the buck as he was getting up off of the ground. But his wife at the same time was trying to take the rifle away from him to shoot the buck. I think he eventually let her have the rifle, she ran around the front of the truck and rested the rifle on the front bumper, to see the buck go over the hill, out of sight.
I sat in the cab laughing. They both came back to the truck in disbelief. They were not sure what to say, they tried to say, I did not say, the buck was huge, but then that changed to we did not realize you really meant, it was a huge buck. So I told them to get in the truck and we would drive up over the hill and see if we could see the buck, before he got to the fence and over the road. We got to the top of the hill, no buck in sight.
I got a good laugh out of seeing them trying to bale out of the truck and falling on top of each other. I knew they did not believe me, when I was telling them there was a huge buck on the top of the hill.
That was the third and final time I ever saw that buck. That **** thing would have scored in the 180s to maybe 190s. It had a huge typical rack, very tall, very wide, somewhere around 14 points.
The first time I saw that buck, I found him on the side of a big hill, he had just come from across the road. I did not know that at the time, just saw a huge buck on the side of the hill. I had a doctor friend of ours, with me. I was given the job of taking him out to kill his first deer. Then I found that deer. I got the doctor within 100 yards of the buck, but he could not find it, in his scope. I had no buck tags left, so I could not shoot the thing. So it trotted off, not a shot fired. Of the three times I saw the buck, there was never a shot fired at it. All three times, I got someone within 150 yards of the deer. To the best of my knowledge, nobody ever shot that deer.Comment
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A short story, I think I may have told here before.
We were hunting down near Big Wells. It was too of my buddies and me. We each picked a blind, then before sun up, we went out to the blinds, the next morning. Some time before the sun came up, I heard some strange noise, kind of sounded like someone screaming. It quit so I did not put much thought into it. No shots were fired by any of us that morning, so around 9:30 I got out of the blind and went to pick up the other two.
When I got to Todd's blind, he had this strange look on his face, I knew something had happened. I asked him what had happened?
He said sometime before the sun came up, he saw something running towards the blind, so he tried to stand up and see what it was, it was moving towards the blind pretty quickly. So he stuck his head out the window, expecting to see something run under the blind. But instead, he had a great horned owl fly right up in his face, as he looked down, out the window. He said, he about made a hole out the other side of the blind and started screaming very loudly. I busted up laughing. Told him, I had heard him.
Then we picked up his younger brother. When we did, he asked if we had heard anything that sounded like screaming early this morning. He said it was creepy sounding. Todd pointed to himself. Then explained what happened.Comment
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I’ll just say you do not wanna cross paths with a full grown camel at nightComment
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Possibly the same trip or another trip down to Big Wells, it was Brian, Todd and I, again. My mother's ex-husband, used to get dog houses, from drilling rigs, he had bought and we used them for hunting camp houses. They would have bunk beds in each end, with dining and kitchen areas in the middle of the dog houses.
So Brian, Todd and I were all sleeping in one end of the dog house. Brian in one bunk bed, then Todd on the top of a bunk bed and me in the same bunk bed on the bottom. When I got into the bed, I found someone had left multiple wire coat hangers in the bed, under the sheets. I was going to chunk them on the floor, but got a better idea.
I took one of the coat hangers, straightened it out, then bent a large hook on one end. Basically made a large J shape. Then I slid the coat hanger up the side of the wall, between the wall and the bed, then turned it 90 degrees and started feeling around with the coat hanger. Like you would, when trying to open a car door with a coat hanger. Well the first attempt, I did not get any results. I realized the bend on the end, needed to be able to reach out farther. So I rebent the coat hanger. Then slid it back up the wall, between the wall and the upper bunk. Then turned it 90 degrees again. Then started feeling around again. Then thought I felt something, then I heard Todd slap at something. Every time I thought I felt something with the coat hanger I would swing it away and then hear Todd slap at something, then start tossing sheets around. Then eventually, Todd started yelling, is that you down there. I acted like I had no idea what his problem was. I was trying to sleep.
I waited about 10 minutes and then went back to work with the coat hanger. Again I hear Todd slapping at something, then I went to work with the coat hanger again. Then I hear Todd rolling around in the top bunk, tossing sheets and then he started yelling. There is something in this bed. He dropped down on the floor and turned the light on. Looked through the bed, did not see anything. Brian and I told him to go back to sleep and stop being a wuss. He had some comments to make back at us. Then turned the light off and got back up in the bunk. I waited a while, then went back to work with the coat hanger. I did this for about another 15 to 20 minutes. Then Todd came flying out of the top bunk again. Turned on the light and ripped the blankets off of the bed, shook them out, then ripped the sheets off of the bed and shook them out. Then looked over the mattress very well. Then looked over the wall, ect. He found nothing, Brian and I were telling him to stop being a wuss and go to sleep. Brian had no idea what I was doing. The three of us had been playing jokes on each other for years.
Eventually Todd put the bed back together, turned the light out and climbed back up. I waited a while and then went back to work with the coat hanger a few times. Todd was obviously getting ******. I could not help it anymore, I busted up laughing very hard. Todd came flying out of the top bunk, flicked on the light. I was laughing and showed him the coat hanger and told him, there is your spider. Todd has a serious fear of spiders. He was ****** off at that point. He went in the other room, we figured to sleep in the other end of the dog house. But nope, he went and found the Red Rider BB gun. Then it was on. He started shooting both me and Brian, Brian had no part of it, other than talking crap to his brother. We both got shot multiple times. It got rowdy from there. Eventually we knocked off and went back to bed. Todd had to take all of the coat hangers first.
Todd is a big guy, with a very big fear of spiders, I have given him hell, because of his fear of spiders for many years.Comment
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