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Stimulus Checks 2017

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    Stimulus Checks 2017

    Sometime next year, we taxpayers will again receive another 'Economic Stimulus' payment.

    This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by using a Q & A format:

    Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ?
    A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

    Q.Where will the government get this money?
    A. From taxpayers.

    Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
    A. Only a smidgen of it.

    Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
    A.The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a ; high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

    Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China?
    A. Shut up.

    Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. Economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

    * If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will ; go to China or Sri Lanka.

    * If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to theArabs.

    * If you purchase a computer, it will go to India, Taiwan or ; China ...

    * If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras and Guatemala ...

    * If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea.

    * If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan.

    * If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go ; to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.

    Instead, keep the money in America by:

    1) Spending it at yard sales, or

    2) Going to ball games, or

    3) Spending it on prostitutes, or

    4) Beer or

    5) Tattoos.

    (These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. )


    Conclusion:

    Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard ; sale and drink beer all day!

    No need to thank me, I'm just glad I could be of help.

    #2

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      #3
      Good laugh!

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        #4
        I am currently on the west coast so it is still morning and now the table at the restaurant and my phone has half drank coffee on it....


        Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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          #5
          Or......Buy Guns and Suppressors.

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            #6
            about the truth

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              #7
              Originally posted by Outbreaker View Post
              Or......Buy Guns and Suppressors.
              Ammo

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                #8
                Good stuff....sad but true.

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                  #9
                  Or in my case to help pay back student loans...guns and ammo sound a whole lot better

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                    #10
                    True so true

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                      #11
                      Now that is funny and sad at the same time

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                        #12
                        Well done!

                        If I get a free check, I'm going hunting on an American owned Texas ranch.


                        Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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                          #13
                          word

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                            #14
                            but what if the ball game is made up of players from other countries, the beer is owned by the germans, the tattoo is Japanese text, the yard sale was really a Mexican flea market, and the prostitute is Asian?

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                              #15
                              Since I'm on the government dole already do I still get one... ?

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