need help finding someone

[Russ79]

Whenever I am needing advice or direction I always come here. I am needing to find someone to live with my mother, not as a caretaker but as someone to be there if needed. Maybe someone else has been thru this or has some idea on how to go about finding someone. My mother will be 87 on the 21st and is reaching that time where she is going to need someone to be around pretty much full time. Not looking for someone to do cooking or cleaning but because of her health she really needs someone to help with taking care of the place- maybe some yard work, maybe some light carpentry work, but mainly be there to watch the place and feed the cats if she is sick, in the hospital, or wants to be gone for a few days to visit family. My stepdad passed away five years ago and she has been taking care of things pretty much by herself since then and is realizing that it is getting to be more than she can handle by herself considering the health issues she is having. There is a separate "mother-in-law" cottage on her place that she would offer rent free- you pay the utilities. She would like to find someone that is maybe retired (someone with a job takes away from being there full time) and be willing to pay a little if she needs particular jobs done for her.

The problem we have encountered is that even churches are not really interested in make suggestions or recommendations due to liability issues. Has anybody ever had to deal with something like this before and could maybe give me some direction.

[Russ79]

Does anyone know if there are any kind of organizations out there that can help with something like this?

[Grayson]

Oh man, be very very careful here. I cannot tell you how many times I have dealt with families whose elderly parents have been stolen from and taken advantage of by people like this.

[MySRT8U]

My advice is move her in with you, or vice versa. Like Grayson said, people take advantage of the elderly and I would have a VERY hard time trusting my mothers care with someone from a random organization.


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[Russ79]

I live about two miles form her and one moving in with the other is not really an option. I don't want to go into a lot of family history but the main thing is my mother is still sharp enough to be able to take care of herself but due to arthritis and bone spurs on her spine she is having a hard time getting around. Plus she is too darn independent to ask for help or be beholding to anyone- even me. I can pick up a prescription for her that will cost less than $1 and she insists on paying me. It is a situation where someone needs to be around to help with some of the little things and be there so she can be gone from the house for more that a couple of hours. She is paranoid about being gone too long for fear of a fire at the house with her dog and cats trapped inside or someone coming in and stealing her blind. She lives in the country with no close neighbors so having someone around would be a comfort and piece of mind. I can't be there 24/7 so that is why we are looking.

[thegrouse]

I live about two miles form her and one moving in with the other is not really an option. I don't want to go into a lot of family history but the main thing is my mother is still sharp enough to be able to take care of herself but due to arthritis and bone spurs on her spine she is having a hard time getting around. Plus she is too darn independent to ask for help or be beholding to anyone- even me. I can pick up a prescription for her that will cost less than $1 and she insists on paying me. It is a situation where someone needs to be around to help with some of the little things and be there so she can be gone from the house for more that a couple of hours. She is paranoid about being gone too long for fear of a fire at the house with her dog and cats trapped inside or someone coming in and stealing her blind. She lives in the country with no close neighbors so having someone around would be a comfort and piece of mind. I can't be there 24/7 so that is why we are looking.

Be very careful. Many agencies I have seen literally hire these people out of prison. It is awful and criminal cases are tough to prove when nobody saw anything and a bunch of stuff turned up missing over time. I don't have any specific recommendations but have you thought about contacting a local senior center and asking them for ideas? Maybe they have some folks that volunteer their. Just a thought. Good luck.

[stykshooter]

You might wanna call a Senior assisted living facility in your area they may phone #'s or company names of Providers who can assist you.