any good disfunctional family christmas stories

[ThisLadyHunts]

1986, grandpa got drunk at Christmas, pulled a gun and started talking ****, my uncle thought he was gonna take it away, took a 357 through the chest, aunts husband took one through the leg, and grandpa got beat up pretty good.
Uncle lived but lost control of his right arm, lot of nerve damage, and about 3 yrs recovery.
Aunts husband had no permanent damage.
No charges filed, nobody went to jail.
The good ole days

The only thing keeping this from sounding like a Robert Earl King song is that it doesn’t rhyme!

[Fishndude]

The only thing keeping this from sounding like a Robert Earl King song is that it doesn’t rhyme!

Nothing rhymes with “chit”?

[ThisLadyHunts]

Nothing rhymes with “chit”?

Hah! Gimme a little “chit” and I can work wonders!

[BBRU]

This was a few years ago but man did it have me sitting on the couch 100% entertained with the situation that was playing out right in front of me.

We were all at my MIL's house for Christmas one year and my wife has a pretty wild relative, we will call this person X. Person X is a female.

Person X is married to Person Y and they have a precious little daughter.

Well about a week before this Person X's husband, Mr. person Y suspected his wife was running around on him but had no proof, but did think he knew the guys name.

The night before Chirstmas Mrs. X had to much to drink and while she wasnt paying attention her husband grabbed her phone and changed who he thought she was running around on him withs phone number to his number but left the name the same so that any text she sent that weekend would be strait to his phone instead of the suspected "friend".

Well Christmas morning rolls around and we are all sitting around the tree waiting on everyone to gather except for Mrs. X who is in the bathroom taking Nudes and sending them to who she thought was her friend back home with some pretty explicit wording below them not know they were going strait to Mr. Husband Y who is reading these all out for everyone to see and hear in the living room. BEST CHRISTMAS EVER.

Hilarious!!!

[Anvilheadtexas]

My family is fairly drama free…. But. A few years ago my brother and his two sons and I slipped up to the farm for a quick pre-xmas hunt/bondathon. Deer hunting in late December in Polk County can start to be good again, but the boys were more interested in poker and the whiskey. This is when it always goes awry. One thing lead to the other and we are all pie-eyed. The morning hunt did not look good. And that’s when the subject of Pogosa Springs came up after said town was referenced in a song we were listening to by String Cheese Incident. Now understand this…no one in our family has ever lived in Colorado, gone to school in Colorado or even spend much time up there, but the two boys seemed to really take pride in knowing this geographic trivia about the mountain range that Pagosa Springs is in. One went with the Rockies and one went with the San Juan’s. (Which one went with which mountain range is lost to the haze of the hooch, and I believe the San Juan brother was correct, but in interest of family peace we have never really revisited the topic). What is known is each of the boys was 110% sure they were right. The debate got lively and before we knew it the boys were shirtless throwing blows in the front yard full on white trash style. The brawl went three rounds before the uncle and the old man could break them up. Both got their licks in. The Crown Royal is off limits now to the boys and the evening is now quietly referred to as The Pagosa Springs Incident. Good clean fun. Neither of us made the morning hunt.

[Johnny Dangerr]

A Thanksgiving tale.

https://www.yahoo.com/news/stray-bullet-kills-man-eating-174019001.html

[Hoggslayer]

I was looking forward to having another entry this year but we have Covid.

Its just going to be my wife, daughter, MIL and I.

Still plenty potential to go south, it is frigging Christmas.

[Gclyde28]

This was a few years ago but man did it have me sitting on the couch 100% entertained with the situation that was playing out right in front of me.

We were all at my MIL's house for Christmas one year and my wife has a pretty wild relative, we will call this person X. Person X is a female.

Person X is married to Person Y and they have a precious little daughter.

Well about a week before this Person X's husband, Mr. person Y suspected his wife was running around on him but had no proof, but did think he knew the guys name.

The night before Chirstmas Mrs. X had to much to drink and while she wasnt paying attention her husband grabbed her phone and changed who he thought she was running around on him withs phone number to his number but left the name the same so that any text she sent that weekend would be strait to his phone instead of the suspected "friend".

Well Christmas morning rolls around and we are all sitting around the tree waiting on everyone to gather except for Mrs. X who is in the bathroom taking Nudes and sending them to who she thought was her friend back home with some pretty explicit wording below them not know they were going strait to Mr. Husband Y who is reading these all out for everyone to see and hear in the living room. BEST CHRISTMAS EVER.

The real question is why am I just now finding out about this story on TBH? You been holding out man.

[jshouse]

The real question is why am I just now finding out about this story on TBH? You been holding out man.

yikes

[Colton]

Nothing truly dysfunctional here, but one of my wife’s cousins is wearing a “Sleigh the Patriarchy” sweater ��

[rtp]

Nothing truly dysfunctional here, but one of my wife’s cousins is wearing a “Sleigh the Patriarchy” sweater ��

Female cousin Im assuming?

[Colton]

Female cousin Im assuming?

Yes sir

[droebuck]

Nothing truly dysfunctional here, but one of my wife’s cousins is wearing a “Sleigh the Patriarchy” sweater ��

I bet she is married to a real head of the household kind of fella.🤣

[Colton]

I bet she is married to a real head of the household kind of fella.🤣

Nah she is single to the best of my knowledge

[SJP51]

Nah she is single to the best of my knowledge

And likely to remain that way.