I've hesitated on posting this several times, but I'm in a bad place with my marriage, my wife told me in January that she wanted a separation, we talked about what our issues were (most of which revolved around my poor treatment of her over the first 6 years of marriage when I got back from Iraq and was dealing with PTSD, a battle which I finally conquered in July of 2014, and some underlying abadonment and abuse issues she experienced as a child that those 6 years opened back up) and agreed to try to work on our marriage. Since then I've tried countless times to woe my wife, with little or no effect. The last couple of months have been especially tough, as my feelings of loneliness have dramitcally increased and things came to a head a couple of weeks ago when she again asked for a separation in hopes that she could go to counseling and hopefully reunite when she's in a better place. Admittedly I'm not handling the situation well, I've been needy and demanding and she feels as if I'm pressuring her, which causes her to further withdraw from me. It's a vicious cycle that seems to play itself out every couple of days. After much pleading with her, she has agreed to have me stay in the house and support her through this time, and asked me to not pressure her or be needy. I'm really struggling with this though, because all I want is to feel that someone loves me, I long for it like oxygen. I'm not afraid to admit that my wife is my whole world, I wouldn't be the man I am without her, and I couldn't have made it through those 6 years without her. Needless to say, this is really heartbreaking for me and I'm depressed, I've taken the necessary steps to do what I can to deal with that by seeing a doctor and getting on Wellbutrin, but these feelings of loneliness and depresion or seeming to linger, and I'm not sure how to handle them. She attended a counseling session today, and the counselor told her that she has to confront these issues in order to feel emotions again, and that in the meantime I need to stop being needy and pressuring her. We have an appointment on the 28th to talk more about it. I've spent a lot of time reflecting and praying to God for guidance, and I'm commited to our marriage and want things to work out between us for the sake of us and our three beautiful children. I just am not sure I'm strong enough to do this on my own, I'm casting my cares on the Lord and praying like I never have for her, myself, and my kids. Can you guys please pray for us too? I could really use some encouragement right now, I know that these hard times will pass, and right now it's time for me to step up and be her rock, and Lord knows that I want too. I'm just feeling very weak right now, I don't know when things will get better. Please pray for us and pray God gives me a strength I never knew I had.
Ron
Ron
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