My kid doesn't want to go to school

[Skinny]

Put a shovel in his hand for 8 hrs a day and make him work. He will be fine with going to school after that.

[Jason]

Is homeschooling an option? The education system is so messed up, I cringe every time my kiddos walk in the doors. Generally speaking, public school is made for one type of student and everyone must fit that certain mold.

I understand about making kids do things they don't want to and dealing with people they don't like, but I can change jobs if I want. I can get a job where I minimize the amount of people I deal with. There is absolutely nothing wrong with swinging a shovel (or wrench, or hammer, or sitting alone in cubicle staring at computer screen all day) if that's what works for you. We want our children to be well rounded and adjusted kids then we throw them into a system that seeks to make all of them fit a certain mold.

For some, school is simply a torturous drudgery that they feel they have no way out of. Others love school.There a several on here that are very familiar with homeschooling and can help with curriculum and things like that if you decide to go that route.

[Joshua Flournoy]

I know, no one wants to go to school.

My 6th grade son really doesn't want to go to school this year. Last year towards the end of the school year the teachers checked out and there was fighting, bickering, name calling, etc for the last two months or so. My son came home every day and told my wife what happened. He was done with it last year and didn't want to go then. That was the first time he didn't like school. We hoped the summer would make him forget about it, but it hasn't. So far this year the teachers and kids have been good. One of the worst two kids moved to another school. Even with the new teachers and a new year he doesn't want to go. There are several snobby kids at his school. He gets so upset every morning as my wife is bringing him to school. He keeps saying he wants to be home schooled. He has lots of friends, but none of the friends get along with each other. My son can't handle stress, bickering, and fighting. It really upsets him. His is the biggest sweetest kid up there. I have asked him several times what the problem is, and he just says he doesn't want to go. He doesn't have a reason. Last year he had several kids try to pick on him. Each time either the kid left crying or he held them in a wrist lock until the teacher came. He can easily handle his own. He is a good A/B student, starting both lines in football, black belt in TKD, great home life. I just can't figure out what to do.

Any suggestions? I have offered him to cut all activities and just be a kid, but he wants to do sports. I don't know what to do. School at that age is supposed to be fun.

I think your son has already answered the question for you.

[oktx]

There is obviously something going on. I would tell him that you may be able to help him if he will tell you what the problem is, if he won't tell him there is not much you can do. Good luck!

[boy wonder]

My daughter went through something similar, but not quite as severe as yours seems to be. I just had calm conversations with the about it. They are transitioning from children to young adults, it's difficult. Now my daughter is 26 yo and a school teacher!

[ShockValue]

I would continue to talk to him about it and see if can identify something or someone. 6th grade is tough moving to new school from elemntary with new kids...also older kids. If you aren't monitoring social media/text messages regularly, I would start there.

Good luck. I have a 7th grade girl and feel your pain.

[stinkbelly]

I think we solved the problem. He has not had any issues for a week now. He says school is fun and he had a good day every day.

Now for what happened.
I kept asking him what was wrong, he kept saying he just didn't want to go. I even paid his brother to go undercover and figure out what the problem was and he didn't get any info. We noticed at the same time he was acting the same way about football. He really wanted to play, but he kept complaining that the coaches yell too much. I am one of the assistant coaches and they are out of control for this age group. My boy was so upset he kept saying he wanted to quit. He said he didn't want to play for that coach anymore. About 10 days ago I had it out with the head coach. In the end, I let my boy quit the team. The very next day he was up early for school and ready to go. He was excited. It was like a weight was lifted off his shoulders. After several days of him acting great and wanting to go to school I asked him what his problem was and he said he didn't want to be on that football team because the coach yelled so much. So basically he was stressed from when he woke up until football was over at 8:30pm because he didn't want to play for that coach. This past weekend, he went to my wife and told her that the reason he didn't want to go to school is because football was after school.

My boy said he wanted to play for a team with a nicer coach. I tried to switch him, but the peewee football organization said he stayed with the same coach or quits. So he quit. He loves playing football so hopefully this peewee football coach didn't ruin it for him.

Thanks for all the comments. In the end I did what I thought was best for my son and it worked.

[DaveS903]

Way to go, Dad!

[oktx]

Glad it's fixed. Shame they wouldn't let him switch.

[curtintex]

Peewee football coaches crack me up...it's a shame he ruined what should have a been a great experience for your son. He'll get to Jr High next year where real sports start and have coaches that are much more likely actual former athletes and supervised by athletic coordinators who were as well. He'll love playing for his school, representing his town and going to school will be a part of it. Good luck and glad you found out what the problem was.

[denimdeerslayer]

Cowboy up and get your butt in school! Welcome to life.