Dear Mr. "Some Assembly Required"

[BigL]

Dear Mr. "Some Assembly Required", December 23, 2011

You Sir are a "Dead Man walking". When I find you, and I will, you will regret the day you came up with the idea of cutting your labor cost by having me the customer assemble your toys.

Yes, it's almost Christmas, and of course I love those kids, even if I've spent 3 of the most ****ing frustrating hours of my life, with;180 3.5x22 ka screws, 120 4x45mm PWA screws, 40 6x30mm allen key bolts and 39 - NOT - 40 washers you ****head!

When I find you, "in the Face or in the Gut" will not be options.

What rocket scientest came up with using 3.5x22 ka screws anyway? What's the matter couldn't you find anything smaller? I'm sure he thinks that was just hystarical? Do you realize how small they are? Do you!!! Well he can run but he can't hide.

And another thing, is the guy that "Pre-Drills" those pilot holes Drunk every day or just when he worked on the unit I bought??? Don't you guys own a ruler???

He's on my list TOO.

CUSTOMER SUPPORT HOTLINE my butt, is there even a phone on the other end? I hate you and the horse you rode in on. If I see that horse he's going to the glue factory.

Who did you get to write those instructions? Albert Einstien?? Why is there 19 pages to put together a ***** ****ing TOY!!! AND WERE THE **** IS PAGE 5!!! I HATE YOU!

Suck Flaming Death & Die,

Eric Anderson.

If you find the person responsible, kick him in his taint until his nose bleeds!

[Gummi Bear]

I feel your pain...

My folks and in-laws got together and bought Twerpy a playset a few years ago. Not a swingset; uh-uh, this sucker is full blown with tree house, monkey bars, rock wall, swings and a private garden and sitting area.

I should have gotten the hint, when they didn't deliver it. It was too big.

All the pieces together were near 1,000 lbs, and I had to take my 16' trailer to the store to pick it up.

By the time it was done (I kept careful track), I had over 100 man hours in it, and a sizable mountain of beer cans to the side. (I quit drinking shortly after it was complete, my poor liver couldn't handle any more projects like that!)


Thankfully she still plays with it, and it's not just a mow-around in the back yard.

[bowhunter2989]

i feel your frustration, but with that said this was funniest thing ive read all day. Hope you get everything built!

[Tejas Wildlife]

I love this thread!!!!!!!!!! I'm setting on the boat, missing Christmas this year and the comments here have me laughing on the floor with tears coming out of my eyes.

Oh man, my ribs hurt! Good luck guys & gals. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!!!

[Ironman]

Forget LOL, I'm freaking laughing out loud! Been there! Way too funny!
Just know that these are the precious memories. They grow up too fast! Enjoy!!

[jgard2522]

Lol

[Carbon Poison]

if you find the person responsible, kick him in his taint until his nose bleeds!

rolmao!!!!!!!

[Lockpro]

Glad you all liked it. I first posted this on some board about 10 years ago as a tribute to all the fathers and their frustrations. I'm grinning ear to ear on thew fun you had with it.

Merry Christmas to all!

[Bisch]

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!

Bisch

[Snacks]

Lolol