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    Monitoring text messages

    I was thinking about the horrible youth suicide thread that was on here yesterday. I also saw a show on TV last night about "cyber-bullying" in teens via email and text messages. One of the victims was being bullied via text messages, but was too ashamed to talk to his parents. Luckily it was caught prior to anything terrible happening, but it got me to wondering. I have a pre-teen (almost 12) and it scares me to think this could be happening to him. I have talked to him and we have a great open relationship, but the thought of him being bullied still worries me.

    Does anyone know if there is a way to monitor text messages remotely via a website or computer? I have been wrestling whether it would be an invasion of his privacy, but I have to look at it as I am his parent, my job is to protect him. I have considered taking his phone, but I feel it serves more good purposes than bad, but like anything else, if used improperly, it can be a bad thing.

    Really torn on this, what say the GS?

    #2
    Does he have internet access on his phone?

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      #3
      I'm technologically defficient, but it seems like the provider could have all of his text messages automatically forwarded, but then your phone might be blowing up, all day.

      I don't have kids, but I think your proactive approach is great.

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        #4
        you can set up an online account with your provider. Once you do, you can see EVERY incoming and outgoing text message.

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          #5
          Originally posted by DrenalinJunkie View Post
          you can set up an online account with your provider. Once you do, you can see EVERY incoming and outgoing text message.
          i did not know that. Good info. I have an online AT&T account but never saw where I could access this.

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            #6
            Too invasive in my opinion. I feel that if y'all continue to have an open relationship, he will open up if there happens to be a problem. Best of luck!

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              #7
              We monitor our 12yr old daughter's texts and overall cell phone usage. There are no locked doors or private phone calls in my house. Kids make bad decisions. It's up to us to try to protect them and teach them.

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                #8
                We have an open phone policy, we can check it at any time. I think, depending on your provider, you can have the texts emailed to you on a daily or weekly basis. See this link, have not tried it, but our guys are in high school. I don't expect them to me any more or less verbally polite than I was at their age or mine now. That being said, we have talked to them extensively about what you send and are sent via text and email can have very long lasting implications, (that is unless you are a QB for the Vikings.) This includes police charges and jail time.



                Hope this helps

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                  #9
                  Originally posted by DrenalinJunkie View Post
                  you can set up an online account with your provider. Once you do, you can see EVERY incoming and outgoing text message.
                  Not true...unless the FCC and gov have changed their rules.

                  Originally posted by mhbaseball View Post
                  i did not know that. Good info. I have an online AT&T account but never saw where I could access this.

                  Last I was told from AT&T and other carries was it was a violation of FCC laws and regs to give you text messages, even your own. It was going to take a court order and warrant when I needed mine. LE has to follow this as well, from what I have found and been told.

                  This was 5 1/2 years ago, so things may have changed a bit though!
                  Last edited by Blue Tick; 01-06-2011, 09:59 AM.

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                    #10
                    My wife and I have fought about this for years but I think I finally wore her down and she now agrees. I have two girls, 13 and 15. I look at all of their text messages, e-mails, websites, facebook. etc. My thoughts are, I want to know what is going on in their lives, and what they are saying and fully understand they are probably not going to tell me. My way has discovered things here and there and helped our girls out. I do make sure they understand as long as they are under Mom and Dad's roof and we are paying the bills, we will be looking. It is our job after all to help and guide them through life.

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                      #11
                      I can go online on Sprint and see all picture mail sent and received on my account. I couldn't find where it showed my texts.

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                        #12
                        My opinion, is that if you give a child a phone at that young of an age, then you also have given them the right to privacy. You may not want to see everything that comes across in a text. Just talk to them. Spying on them is not the way to go. If you think that they are having problems on the phone, then take it away. Simple as that. Of course, that is just my opinion. Bullying and sex talk happens anyway. Phones and the internet just seem to make them more prevelant.

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                          #13
                          Originally posted by ovalohunter View Post
                          I can go online on Sprint and see all picture mail sent and received on my account. I couldn't find where it showed my texts.
                          Did it actually show the pics? I know when I look at mine, it just shows text sent/received or MMS sent/received!

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by Blue Tick View Post
                            Not true...unless the FCC and gov have changed their rules.




                            Last I was told from AT&T and other carries was it was a violation of FCC laws and regs to give you text messages, even your own. It was going to take a court order and warrant when I needed mine. LE has to follow this as well, from what I have found and been told.

                            This was 5 1/2 years ago, so things may have changed a bit though!
                            we just did it 2 years ago on my sisters phone that is in my mother's name.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Originally posted by Snipehunter View Post
                              My opinion, is that if you give a child a phone at that young of an age, then you also have given them the right to privacy. You may not want to see everything that comes across in a text. Just talk to them. Spying on them is not the way to go. If you think that they are having problems on the phone, then take it away. Simple as that. Of course, that is just my opinion. Bullying and sex talk happens anyway. Phones and the internet just seem to make them more prevelant.
                              Well said....

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